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2004-01-22T11:59:00.001+08:00

MOVED

finally. byee enigmatic-rose.blogspot.com

2004-01-22T11:59:00.000+08:00

MOVED

finally.

2004-01-15T19:36:00.001+08:00

im thru with wishing stars. sooooo thru with them.

2004-01-12T21:19:00.000+08:00

sigghhhhhhhhhhh.
today so not a good day. gonna flunk e math terribly. n there's pple sayin the pple too easy.*bumps head against the wall-dumb u dumb u dumb u dumb u dumb u.
yeps, and my mouth got me into trouble again. whatssss new.
and tmr/ss and his. I CANT STUDY. sigh anyways, its no use

arrrgh.
i just really wish pple wld just leave me alone. i know im not what i can be. but what do they know abt what i can be anyways? arrrgh.
and im startin to hate my entire class right now beneath all thngs.

someone shooooooot me.

2004-01-10T19:11:00.000+08:00

woah had busy busy days. yeps and britney got married and then was single again. note the word single. tsk. who gets married to childhood frens anyway?sigh, she so needs a counseller. either that, she needs drugs. much more.

thurs: went over to shir's house. and studied. for like 15 mins. lol kept talkin..explored her house..played wit the com and haha...studied a condom close up. and i even took pics of it *giggle giggle* hah but i din dare touch it. reason? dint want lubricant of THAT sort all over my hands cum notes cum textbook cum pens. :d stayed till 10-11 plus. and yea. went home, cldnt sleep again. but my mom juz refuses to get me the drugs cos guess she thnks i'll abuse it. parents. hmm shall try camomhile tea. oooohhh did i mention rcc's my eng teacher? he rocks!!

fri: hmm. this is kinda personal.actually no one reads blogs anyways yea? but o well nvm.

sat:went 2 sch at 930 thnkin i'd be bored outta my soul for some MALAY creative writing course.

fact #1:it rocked

fact #2:made me learn to appreciate the malay lang. for what it is. haha and i'll def put in more effort from now onwards. :d i love languages/arts subjects...except art itself.

fact #3:i can now say im a perfectionist in malay
saya seorang yang suka kesempurnaan

fact #4:i really love love poetry. tho i admit im nt a gd writer myself, just reading them simply amazes me. haha i realised that whenever i read a poem, and i somehow can imagine exactly how that person feels, i actually start tearin.hahs i don cry. so yea. thats a BIG thng. :) guess poetry where my true self comes out..i don hafta pretend...and everythng is so abstract and open for everyone's judjement..but they'll nv know the truth..its just so..i donno whats the word...er...ethreal yes, thats it, ethreal.
fact #4: the person who conducted the course was my mt teacher's sis. and boy is she a gr8 poet. and her books are so cool. they're bilingual. lol so there's the malay and eng version of the poems.amazin aint it? :d hahas. yay finally somethng i can understand. i like ''potrait of a doll'' or malay:''lukisan boneka'' a lot. but sadly, its in her 2nd book and i received her 1st. oh well..it still rocks. hahas. i see light.

fact #5: i hvnt started studyin yet. in other words. my fate is sealed. im dead. sigh...donno why i cant concentrate and motivate myself. oh wells ad majorem del gloriam! i just love latin. :) and i hate pple who say they love it when they dont know the true beauty of it. *middle finger* argh whatever. im gonna study it someday. and shove it into all these idiotic pple's faces. *smiles* you're goin down, you insane POMPOUS freaks.

fact #6: i decided to aim for SAJC. then, i'll go overseas after JC. and im itchin to be a lawyer. hooray for me.

fact #7:why the hack is my entry in fact form? oh well whatever. language rocks. lit rocks! chem's cool.a math's an ASS that im sooooo itchin to smack.e math's 1/100 of the ass it was before.physics peeps are insane wit insane fashion sense and insane hair.

hmm. i bade thee farewell. and go stare at my books for another hour or so. absorb nothin. come back here, complain till 2am. start writing really good notes till 3am. then knock out. gosh im so predictably boring, its actually fascinating. earth 2 sharan, earth to sharan. HEADSTART'S ON MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!

2004-01-05T18:22:00.000+08:00
i hate school. i hate my f**kin class. dont understand whats so gr8 abt it. its the worst class ive ever been in. the only pple im truly okay with are adora and jon and some ive known since sec1.actually not really. argh whatever.
[sorry amie, i really hate it]
sigh tuition later, in 20 mins approx. and i soo am not in the mood.
after that, rush lots of hmwk. and revision
pfffft

did i mention my math teacher sucks?
cos she does. so does my physics.

SIGH

anyways, thnkin of droppin amath.
by feb/march.
sigh
`insanely blessed. choose to birth me in sg. yet don get me the brains. -sigh-

2004-01-01T15:13:00.001+08:00
my new yr's resolutions

1) to remember i am worthy of bein loved by God

2)To reaffirm that I am not now, never have been, though i wanna be but never will be a victim.

3)To remember to focus on my studies to forget reality; try aim for a SPECTACULAR score for my o's

4)To go down to 110

5)To find happiness within myself, not thru external validation

6)Care more for my frens, but not neglecting other thngs like 2003

7)To be nice. [actually i could do without this]

8)To finish reading 'Love yourself- self-acceptance and depression'

9)To fight all such thoughts

10)To read at least a quarter of the old testament. so then i'll have 3/4 to go bfore ive read the whole bible once!

11)To achieve the balance between work, play and procrastination.

12)Be myself more when im around myself[gotta stop kidding myself]

13)Grow my hair LONG

14)Save money to buy stuffs only durin the hols.

15)To help others way beyond what i did 2003, i know its bad but i cant help feelin that way..sorry yea

16)To finally be able to keep my new year resolutions FOR ONCE

2004-01-01T15:13:00.000+08:00
woah had an *eventful new year. well it was great fun[i cld'a done w/o the waterbombs splattered on me thnx]. just how parties are supposed to be. :d oh wells.
sigh and i din sleep AT ALL two nights in a row. tried to sleep just now but only could like zonk out for a 3 hrs. argh.
must be the stress gettin 2 me. sigh i really don get it. why aint anyone stressed but me? maybe its cos everyone's smart and poor sharan's dduuuuummbbb, as expected. hahs. and amelia knws somethng else eh? :(

*aah, bite me. [literally]

2003-12-31T17:13:00.000+08:00
woah just came back frm my gma's house. been a loong time since i went.
hahs..it kinda brought back loads of memories..mostly sweet..playin arnd wit my cousins and bro..runnin arnd frm place to place..i really kinda miss those days...what i had to give up and evrythng..but its fine and great to revisit it again however borin my day was =)

anyways, shanqi gonna come my house later..and abt 12 plus we're gonna go for a party thngy. hahs..im only goin cos i'd feel sooo guilty turnin down amelia again :p
oh wells...its gonna be sorta a sleepover anyways...so yea...cya guys tmr!
oh and have a happy new yr. hope it lasts...

2003-12-30T13:29:00.005+08:00
[One day I woke up and realized I couldn't find myself.
No matter what I accomplished or what I wore or how
I looked or who my friends were, my Self was nowhere
to be seen. I was lost to me, and that's as lonely as it gets]

Questions.......Who am I? Do I feel? Am I happy? Does anyone hear my screams? Does anyone see me hear? Am I the only one who sees these lies? Does anyone see my unhappiness? Does anyone care? Am I sad? Who are my friends? Do I still Love you? Do I miss you? Do I understand? Do I think about it everysingle day? Do I wonder what you are doing? Am I scared? Am I depressed? Do I cry every day at night thinking about you? Do I miss your hand when Bad things happened and everything would be right again? Am I in denial of the fact that I can never see you again? Do I cry of that fact every single second? Do I miss you?Do I regret that i have to hide everything from everyone?
Yes

i used to think everyone was a star in their own lives.
now i realise im a raggedy-ann in all
-made to take tears and hide my own
-made to comfort
-made so that others can hide behind me and shove me in front of them, when their pain's gone, or someone else comes along, im pushed away then scolded at for bein hypersensitive
- i cant take it anymore [onlywhenistoptothinkaboutit]
i love being invisible, i wanna be invisible.i never dreamt of being a shield, not in my wildest illusions
-i wasnt made for happiness, i was made so others could use me till they've found their happiness
-i know, im not supposed to ask for more, i dont deserve what i already have yet im not depreciating it.
-i just cant help being selfish at times ya noe? i just don wanna sacrifice my life anymore. i don wanna stop and thnk ''oh no but he/she's gonna be hurt if i don do this, okay fine just this one last time ill do it for them. who ends up with the scars? im not a freakin mandy who just gives and gives and gives and gives and gives and gives, then sent away, weary, sad, lonely, depressed and alone.
-i hate being caught up in this mess, i dont wanna be that person anymore, i dont wanna be yr shield, if anythng, i want my own shield...just a friend..
i want someone i can cry to, can talk and say anythng to, i want someone 2 be there for me but not neglectin themselves first, i want someone who understands me and is able to tell me my character from just 5 mins of hearin my troubles, i don wanna be tht slave anymore, i wanna break out of this

-----its never gonna work aint it. raggedy-ann for life. smile and smile and smile. i don just smile all the time, raggedy-anns are allowed to cry 2. esp when their cancerians who r extremely moody. and im not crappin this time. im tellin the truth, just like it is.
i need a break frm bein everyone's raggedy-ann. my strings wont work anymore, the key's broken so you cant wound me up again.
please im beggin, i need time alone from everyone, from everythng, from all those perceptions, i need time to find myself again, so i wont mind being trapped in a doll's body for a while, i just need to get out now, when i can hold my feelings back again, when i can learn to put others first again, when im a shield again, when im thick-skinned again, find me. just leave me alone now, please. just this 1 thng from a broken rusty shield.

2003-12-30T13:29:00.003+08:00
soppy old me.
i was lookin thru yahoo grps and everythng.
then i came across a1sg...where i met pple like--suzi, taffy, tiff, lianne, anna, slick, xueling, amanda etc.
and i started thnkin of p6-sec 1 and all those crazy times..
and i started bawling my eyes out.
*lol somethng's come over me i swear.
anyways, if u guys are interested again :d...

a1singapore

2003-12-30T13:29:00.001+08:00
oops forgot 2 mention! i cut my hair, HORRIBLYYYYYYYY.
aargh oh well.

2003-12-30T13:29:00.000+08:00
ive got a 100 bucks tangs voucher, and i couldnt find ANYTHING to buy in tangs!!!! *curses*. i was into sooo much stuffs...but then i thnk abt it and realise i cld live w/o it...so i ended up buyin NOTHING! arrrrghhhhh. oh well at least i have till nov 2005. *thnk lancome's mystic divine*
anyways, snuck into an nc16 movie, scary movie 3 yesterday. :d i got in w/o difficulties, but the guy questioned athalia! lol. anyways, the movie was so darn funny!! everyone's gotta go catch it, go go gooo. its soo cute. hahs tho sometimes quite perverse. a great-feel gd movie anyways. :)

AND 1 thng 2 commment about. i saw 3 boootylicious guys yesterday. guess wat. they're all caucasians. its done, finally, sg'eans, or maybe asians[guys only], have finally lost commendable second looks! how sick is that. oh wells. those 3 were reallly cute tho. *swoons
hot guy no. 1) wearin a white sleeveless tee sayin ''bintang baru'' on his back..hahas...holdin a tiger beer can, black berms, horrid slippers, and greeaaaat face.
hot guy no. 2 in the cinema, white tee with jeans and an oh-s0-strng resemblance to josh[yes, hartnett!] and matt damon, combine those two, whaddya get....hooottttttttttness! lol, the best thng, he had a fren who's hair was sooo big, [hnk the sunglasses guy in that 70s show] and he was soo tall, so it was easy to spot him, so easy to find hottie no. 2!! *grin.
his other fren, athalia likes. x)
hot guy no. 3 on the escalator goin to borders. aaah he was hot..wearin a red shirt..thats all i know bt him. hahas.oh well, still hottttttttttt tho.

oh well, had an excitin day more or less. excitin swoonilicious day.
aaah sch's startin and i havent done 90% of my homework[only done the grammar/kingsway, sigh.] and i havent even done ANY revision!!! whereee did all the hols disappear to anyways. argh. a yr of sloggin cum double/triple whammy stress and did i mention harrrdd hittin sloggin wit loadsa caffeine, late nights, books and NO SLEEP????
sigh.evryone's so postive bout next yr,''2004 the answer to all our problems, startin anew''. lucky freaks who dont hafta do their o's next yr. aaaarrrgh.
oh well, i'll just try cram everythng on thurs nite. *huge heavy heavy xtremely heavy SIGH*

oh well. hope 2004 wld be a brighter yr economically, spiritually and stuffs too. hmm.

2003-12-28T14:44:00.001+08:00
erm yea anyways, advertisin time. anyone wants 2 go 2 a countdown partaaaay in fort cannin pls msg me or somethng. its goona be real fun. 7-9: carnival and bands playing. 9-1: errr. forgot wat's gonna be on then. lotsa singin, dancin, havin fun and playin arnd lah. and also worshippin since it IS a church event. nevertheless, its gonna be real fun so comme allonng. :d

bird flu=me

2003-12-28T14:44:00.000+08:00
ive got the bird flu. now how dumb is that.sigh. and a freakin headache. slight fever. and the tendency 2 slurrrrrrrrr my words. gosh i feel sooo like a drunkard. who's not a drunkard.
whatever. never fnd a test that's so apt b4. hmm well at least someone understands. tho its not livin n its a quiz thngy full of words. watever im blabberrin.

borderline

Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-12-23T17:14:00.007+08:00
the xmas song
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire,
Jack Frost nipping on your nose,
Yuletide carols being sung by a choir,
And folks dressed up like Eskimos.

Everybody knows a turkey and some mistletoe,
Help to make the season bright.
Tiny tots with their eyes all aglow,
Will find it hard to sleep tonight.

They know that Santa's on his way;
He's loaded lots of toys and goodies on his sleigh.
And every mother's child is going to spy,
To see if reindeer really know how to fly.

And so I'm offering this simple phrase,
To kids from one to ninety-two,
Although its been said many times, many ways,
A very Merry Christmas to you!
--

merry xmas to everyone.
and yea. praise Jesus.[thank You Lord for forgivin.thank You Lord for sacrificin.thank You Lord for lovin]
this xmas kinda feeels depressin and over-the-toply. sigh.
oh well.
have a depressing, merry and over the top xmas everyone. and remember the cross. and His death. and our sins. and His torture. and His death.
and now, our thanks/love/praise/eternal gratitude

2003-12-23T17:14:00.006+08:00
And if I cried
And if I said I'm sorry
And if I told the truth a million times
Would you believe
Would you believe I'm sorry?
Or would I start to fade and waste away?

I never thought that it would come to this
I never thought you'd waste away
Now I'll drive away my pain
And catch the next flight for LA
Slowly close my eyes and start to waste away

You always said
Your heart is thin and you are
You're getting older once you lose your friends
And now I know
And now I know it's true
And now I start to fade and waste away
I never thought that it would come to this
I never thought you'd waste away
Now I'll wrestle with my brain
Wash away with acid rain
Lay down with my ghosts and start to waste way

And I feel like my body's arched with pain and anger
And I feel like I've been asleep for days.
Now I'll drive away my pain
And catch the next plane for LA
Slowly close my eyes and start to waste away

Now I'll wrestle with my brain
Wash away with acid rain
Lay down with my ghosts and start to waste way

2003-12-23T17:14:00.005+08:00

this is my way to live

What about yours?
made by rav-chan

2003-12-23T17:14:00.004+08:00

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz.

i hate everything about you

2003-12-23T17:14:00.003+08:00
yet another one of their songs. my personal fav. simply amazing song.

i hate everything about you- three days grace
everytime we lie awake
after every hit we take
every feeling that i get
but i haven't missed you yet
every room-mate kept awake
by every sigh and scream we make
all the feelings that i get
but i still don't miss you yet

only when i stop to think about it

i hate everything about you
why do i love you
i hate everything about you
why do i love you

everytime we lie awake
after every hit we take
every feeling that i get
but i haven't missed you yet

only when i stop to think about it

i hate everything about you
why do i love you
i hate everything about you
why do i love you

only when i stop to think about you,
i know
only when you stop to think about me,
do you know

i hate everything about you
why do i love you
you hate everything about me
why do you love me

i hate
you hate
i hate
you love me

i hate everything about you
why do i love you

2003-12-23T17:14:00.001+08:00
anyone's heard of this faaaaaabulous band three days grace? they're totally awesome =)
one of their best songs :

scared-three days grace
At night I hear it creeping
At night I feel it move
I'll never sleep here anymore

I wish you never told me
I wish I never knew
I wake up screaming

It's all because of you
So real these voices in my head
When it comes back to you wont be
Scared and Lonely
You wont be scared
You wont be scared and lonely
You wont be scaed you wont be lonely

I think there's something out there
I think I hear it move
I've never felt like this before

I wish You never told me
I wish I never knew
I wake up screaming

It's all because of you
So real these voices in my head
When it comes back to you wont be
Scared and Lonely
You wont be scared
You wont be scared and lonely
You wont be scaed you wont be lonely

2003-12-22T19:13:00.000+08:00
new template. finally.
but thnk im gonna change again.
cos the stupid ad's blockin all the beautiful words.
hmmpfff.
or maybe i'll just stick wit this[lazy]

oh and guess what..my bro got posted to coral sec. same sch as athalia's sis got posted 2.my gosh.

had a gr8 time wit siying/athalia 2day.bought bags.finally.had a ball basically. man i spent 90 bucks in all.arghhh.

homework study homework study homework study homework study

forgettin

2003-12-18T22:07:00.000+08:00
wooh haad a loong day.
yesterday. went out wit shanqi. got my nails done! then settled down at mph readin russell lee. loads of interestin stuff man. even a recorded experience of druids high priest one-time experience at a satan-ic church. he's at imh now. he said when russell lee interviewed him: i fear for my soul.

hmm.
anyways.yea. then she slept over my house. and yea. then athalia came over. and we studied and had fun and talked a lot abt stuffs. sighhhhhhhh.

anyway. check out todd agnew's this fragile breath. real nice song.

hmmm.somethin like u-nsync's cool 2.

2003-12-17T11:49:00.000+08:00
gettin ready to go out now.
ahahs.

and on thurs.
im goin out again wit shanqi and some fiye-yr called james. :) sigh i really hope her mom lets IAN[her bro] come out wit us. ahahs. he's damn cute and he's six! hahas. spoke to him last nite. ahahs sooo cute! he said: u noe arh just now i go playground then soooo dark then nobody leh! hahahh lol. okay thats not funny. but i thgt it was sooo cute! hahas.

lol okay i just had to write that. never thgt i'll be sayin this. but it'll be cool to brin out kids. :) ahhas.

i wanna babysit!!!
anyone interested to offer me a job? =)

2003-12-16T17:42:00.000+08:00
aaaaaaah. what is wrong wit me. cnt get rid of this stupid naggin freakinly perpetual depression. argh just waitin for me 2 split man. happy happy happy happy. caaaaaaaannnnnntttttttttttttt do it anymore. sigh i wish i wasnt so fuckin born this way. arrgh i hate always bein happy when im not. i hate hate hate pretendin. but tellin the truth's worse. sigh just create my own little bubble within my room...and lock up all my thghts that are true and me.....sigh whatever.......hate superficiality.....yet cant live a single sec without it.....arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i need a break frm life.

anyways. went out wit amelia 2days. went to east coast beach. played arnd in the sand and whatever crap. saw mr sen near my church there. LOL. he was wearin short shorts wit his wife and daughter. whahahs. oh wells.
sat down in the middle of the beach and let the waves engulf me. so wonderful to disappear frm the world even if its just for a second. hmms thnk my ideal choice of death wld be 2 drown. [shut up]

erm.goin out wit shanqi tmr. buyin xmas gifts. feel really bad cos im damn broke and can only get gifts for certain pple. yeas and gonna get a manicure. YEA. finally. sigh. hahas. cant buy gifts but can get manicure. whattever.

feel like im droppin in a black hole...droppin forever and ever and it nv ends.......

arrrgh vicious vicious life.

I fight for the chance to be lied to again
i will never be strong enough
i will never be good enough
i were never conceived in love
i will not rise above

--to afraid to do anythng...do i really wanna die...but then does it matter...if i wanna stay alive**

2003-12-15T13:30:00.002+08:00
feelin horrid horrid horrid.
this sucks

2003-12-15T13:30:00.001+08:00

You're a quiet, unsociable person...but not
necessarily because you hate people...you just
don't understand them and prefer to be left
alone. You don't like
comotion...parties...shallow people. You don't
open up very much, and probably have few close
friends...but that doesn't bother you. You are
the way you are and nothing can change that.

What Kind Of Woman Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-12-15T13:30:00.000+08:00
sigh i just made a decision.
and im sooo lost. so confused.
and there's no one 2 advice me cos im just too proud and they dont ever understand..
all they say is that its so easy 4 me...and they even thnk ive done it long ago....
HAHS....how wrong...
arrrgh i hate blogger.
whatever.
hope this decision is the right one..
i know this is the right one..
but
argh
howwwwww
aaaahh im just so confused...
nvm denial will help...
aaaaahhhhhhhhhhh
where's my angel.

sigh fine ive been bad so i guess i dont get one eh?

2003-12-14T18:48:00.003+08:00
sigh bad mood again bad mood bad mood

2003-12-14T18:48:00.002+08:00
beautiful poem. got it frm here.
----------------------
Morbid Happiness

beauty's in so many things,
like cobwebs come undone
ancient children buried deep
and fully loaded guns

rotting leaves dead in the street
and opal, bleeding wrists
poisoned feasts on tables high
a dying lover's kiss

haunted houses, hiding death
and skulls smashed in the hall
fallen angels screaming
and the darkened forest's call

death is in so many things
that happiness will shun
beauty running rampant
deep in everyone

------------------------

2003-12-14T18:48:00.000+08:00
yay! another quiz frm wendy. hahas. im a quiz addict.

A- Age: fifteen
B- Boyfriend: nada
C- Chore you hate: id rather do chores than hmwk...sigh
D- Dads name:fer wat
E- essential make up item: ooo! eyeliner. and smthng on yr lips @ best.
F- favourite actor: hmmmms. err to name one...josh hartnett!
G- gold or silver: silverrrrr
H- hometown: i live in my rooom :)
I- instruments you play: ehs. piano but i suck at it. and hahas learnin somethng new my fren says ive got potential. ahhas. nahs. not really the type to play instruments. hmm. the bazooka's good 4 me tho!
J- job title: sigh. to LIVE
K- Kids: wld be named....erm josh! ahahs. and somethng else.
L- Living arrangements: wit my parents...sadllly
M- Mom's name: look @ D.
N- number of people u've slept with: hahas. still a V.
O- overnight hospital stays: ehhs. i hate the hospital.
P- Phobia: ahhas. creepy crawlies. movin talkin breathin animals. actually dead non movin talkin breathin animals 2. thats 1 of my phobias. hahs.
Q- quote you like: errrrrrr. ''i hate you''. hahs.
R- regular drink: errr. h20
S- secret crush: ---------
T- time you wake up: today reallli early cos went 2 johor...if not i wake in the noon. :)
U- unique habit: babblin. playin wit my hair. worryin. stressin 2 easily. bein tooo laid-back. aaah start pointin out my endless faults !@#$%
V- vegetable you refuse to eat: i hate ALL veg. cept tofu.
W- worst habit: look at U.
X- X-rays uve had: one
Y- yummy food you make: whahahs. anythng that says ready-2-cook
Z- zodiac sign: craaabb
last kiss: whahas. my dooooogggie!
last good cry: :) yesterday.
last library book checked out: the thng bout me is that i borrow bks and nv remember to retturn them after at least like 6 mths. or else i lose the book and forget abt it completely.
last crush: ---------
last phone call: errr. amelia.
last tv show watched: smash hits
last time showered: this morn. ahahs. `smmeeeelllllllllllllllllllllly'
last shoes worn: errr. loong ago.
last cd played: rhcp - gr8est hits. aaah yea i bought it today!!!!! :)
last item bought: my rhcp cd. lol
last downloaded: errrrrm lets see. someday-nickleback
last annoyance: brrroo. will always be.
last thing written: sigh nothin. don remind me. ive still got looooads of hmwk and ive only finished the grammar and kingsway. arrrrrgggggghhhhhhhhh
last sleep: ehs. 3am today
last chatted with: mark
last sexual fantasy: lols. nil
last weird encounter: hmmms. seeing a wolf that scared the hell outta me this morn.
last ice cream eaten: woah....last sat i thnk...hahas
last time amused: errrm. cant thnk
last time wanting to die: lols what a qn
last time hugged: errms lets see.....looong ago...hahas....if im not wrng...adora...a few days ago....or maybe amie....which is real real long ago...ahhas
last time scolded: errrrrr. last day of sch. mrs loh. sigh whats new. and she's my form teacher next yr. whahahs. im cursed :)
last chair sat in: the chair im sittin on now
last shirt worn: the shirt im wearin now
last poster looked at: hmms. some pop ad of peter pan.
last show attended: errrrm. some horror wit my mom. ahahs.

2003-12-13T21:00:00.001+08:00
sigh really tired....goin jb tmr...tsk tsk. lots of thngs happened today...and im in a total mess...whirlwind...totally confused....donno how 2 advise my frens....and i don apply my advice to my own life...so they turn arnd and tellme: you know how difficult it is and u cant ever do it so why u tellin me 2 do it.
sign. im tellin u cos its the easiest way out. but i know. its kinda impossible. but u gotta persist on. we'll do it 2gether....

hmms. anyways. today's service: POWERFUL. and it kinda answered lots of our qns. and yea. :) God is real. juz love it when pastor/apostle khong speaks cos u really feel the holy spirit and everythng. and yea he shared his testimonial today. sigh. love the fact that durin his sermons he talks realistically. ''growin in christ means takin 3 steps forward and 2 steps back'' how true. im renewed. but yea i know im gonna take 2 steps back. hmm.
anyways......hopin on my prayers and that of my 2 frens....

god..if u're there.....help us get thru this yea? no matter how pain it will be....

2003-12-13T21:00:00.000+08:00

A GARAGE-GURL. Youre into loud music, hot guys and
wild fashions. Youre most at ease when youve
got all your mates around you and you like to
party. Boys are a game and youre always on the
ball because you make sure youre always number
one.
Your virtues: Confidence, fun nature, sociability.
Your flaws: Loudness, jealous tendency, need for
attention.

What kind of girl are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-12-12T14:47:00.004+08:00
heys im a sequential learner!
hahs.

SEQUENTIAL AND GLOBAL LEARNERS

Sequential learners tend to gain understanding in linear steps, with each step following logically from the previous one. Global learners tend to learn in large jumps, absorbing material almost randomly without seeing connections, and then suddenly "getting it."
Sequential learners tend to follow logical stepwise paths in finding solutions; global learners may be able to solve complex problems quickly or put things together in novel ways once they have grasped the big picture, but they may have difficulty explaining how they did it.
Many people who read this description may conclude incorrectly that they are global, since everyone has experienced bewilderment followed by a sudden flash of understanding. What makes you global or not is what happens before the light bulb goes on. Sequential learners may not fully understand the material but they can nevertheless do something with it (like solve the homework problems or pass the test) since the pieces they have absorbed are logically connected. Strongly global learners who lack good sequential thinking abilities, on the other hand, may have serious difficulties until they have the big picture. Even after they have it, they may be fuzzy about the details of the subject, while sequential learners may know a lot about specific aspects of a subject but may have trouble relating them to different aspects of the same subject or to different subjects.

How can sequential learners help themselves?

Most college courses are taught in a sequential manner. However, if you are a sequential learner and you have an instructor who jumps around from topic to topic or skips steps, you may have difficulty following and remembering. Ask the instructor to fill in the skipped steps, or fill them in yourself by consulting references. When you are studying, take the time to outline the lecture material for yourself in logical order. In the long run doing so will save you time. You might also try to strengthen your global thinking skills by relating each new topic you study to things you already know. The more you can do so, the deeper your understanding of the topic is likely to be.

insaaannnitty. but helpful. hmm

2003-12-12T14:47:00.003+08:00
will young - leave right now
I'm here just like I said
Though its breaking every rule I've ever made
My racing heart is just the same
Why make it strong to break it once again?
And I'd love to say I do
Give everything to you
But I can never now be true
So I say...
I think I'd better leave right now
Before I fall any deeper
I think I'd better leave right now
Feeling weaker and weaker
Somebody better show me how
Before I fall any deeper
I think I'd better leave right now
I'm here so please explain
Why you're opening up a healing wound again
I'm a little more careful
Perhaps it shows
But if I lose the highs, at least I'm spared the lows
Now I tremble in your arms
What could be the harm
To feel my spirit calm
So I say..
I think I'd better leave right now
Before I fall any deeper
I think I'd better leave right now
Feeling weaker and weaker
Somebody better show me how
Before I fall any deeper
I think I'd better leave right now
I wouldn't know how to say
How good it feels seeing you today
I see you've got your smile back
Like you say your right on track
But you may never know why
Once bitten twice is shy
If I'm proud perhaps I should explain
I couldn't bear to lose you again
Yes I will...

~this song. is so sweet.

2003-12-12T14:47:00.000+08:00
sigh i am sooo darn bored.
hmms.
adora came 2 my hse yesterday. supposed to do hmwk but oh wells.
taught her the wonders of this stupid internet.
and hahs. she shares a lot of same views as me!
so yea. thats cool.
hahas.

and yea.
thnk im gonna get xmas pressies tmr!
yay.
but i'll only buy that for adora, athalia shirley n amelia. gotta get somethng else for siying. ahhas. ooo yea and gotta get a b/d pressie for siying too. aaaah lucky gal!

hahas.
hmms. what shld i get? somethng black or silver thats for sure. ahhs. okay i'd better stop cos if she reads this there'll be no surprise anymroe!
tralala. rest assured gal, im gonna try get a great b/d pressie for ya this time! [LOL. minus the coke and all our buspasses and whatnot stuck on it. hahas.]

yay! and i finished one mroe piece of hmwk!
and darlin adora gave me the answer sheet to all the compres. so im gonna copy WORD FOR WORD. hahs. at least i bother to. so yea. if i get caught. i'll thnk of it later. and if i dont, which i wont cos he wont mark ;) yippie!!

oo-kay...im deliriously happy and hyper now. must be the xmas spirit!
ahahs.

\listening/sexed up - robbie williams. [such a beeeautiful song. minus the title. hmm]

2003-12-09T23:38:00.001+08:00
Another day has gone
I'm still all alone
How could this be
You're not here with me
You never said goodbye
Someone tell me why
Did you have to go
And leave my world so cold

Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away
Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay

But you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
But you are not alone

'Lone, 'lone
Why, 'lone

Just the other night
I thought I heard you cry
Asking me to come
And hold you in my arms
I can hear your prayers
Your burdens I will bear
But first I need your hand
Then forever can begin

Everyday I sit and ask myself
How did love slip away
Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
For you are not alone

Whisper three words and I'll come runnin'
And girl you know that I'll be there
I'll be there

You are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay
For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though you're far away
I am here to stay

For you are not alone
For I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart

For you are not alone...

mj - you are not alone

2003-12-09T23:38:00.000+08:00
You see in the past
I had a dream
A fantasy
I open up, you ignore me
You're not the same at all
And if I could turn back
The pages of time I'd rewrite you point of view
Washed up to the shore
Given one last chance
To try some more
But I'm tired, I'm freezing
Let's stop and call it history
end it on this.no doubt

sigh. booooogggged down by hmwk.
athalia came 2 my house today.
wanted to do hmwk.
we did do
some.
err yea but oh wells its am improvement
and it helps havin someone to divide the labour with *smiles WIDE

errr yar. anyway made some interestin discovery bout someone i thght i knew. guess i don't. at all. hahas. shall confrnntt when i get the time!

shit i forgot to call a fren back...frm like 1pm!
sigh. nvm talk 2 her tmr.

aaaaaah im still so jealous!! amelia's STILL in ozzie.

i hate hate hate my bro. sigh for those who saw a fuckingly weird nick. dooon believe it or whatever.
sigh i know im sadistic. but i really envision my bro dyin a REAL gruesome death.
and me bein sad. for like a min.
then ill get over it.

and enjoy life as an only child. sigh bliss.

aarrrghhhhhhh killl my broooo ANYONE. and gimmie the tix to catch it. hack ill even pay. err on second thgt. just kill him and get him outta my sight.
and make it real gruesome. please.

oookays. im insanely bored.
and im goin off-lane here.
hmms well i don care.

lists of homewrk to complete
-kingsway [donee!]
-grammar bk 5 [done!]
-12 compres
-60 essay outlines
-12 compos
-420 phrasebk entries[eng]
-500 phrasebk entries[malay] + 30 extra whatever thngys ya call it. oh ya sentences.
-malay wksht
-malay compo
-phy worksht
-history wksht
-lit: read a story and do a wksht
-ss 3b workbook: do every single page
-ss ppt and oral presentation,posters,diagrams,charts on purpose of edu. in sg[individual! while mr lee's classes get to do it in group. sigh]
-ss report on KBEs.[same thng as above. frowwwwwwn]
-content/cover pg for ss file
-redo physics end year papers.

lists of topics to study for headstart
-eng paper 1
-history: chaps 2, 4, 5
-ss:2, 4, 7
-chem: 7, 9, 10, 11, 17
-phy:5, 6, 7, 14, 15
-a math:5, 8, 9
-e math:2, 5, 10

im officially crazed. sigh. someone get me on a plane to wherever i don care. i juz wannt a vacaattiionnn.

2003-12-08T13:36:00.001+08:00
omg my dad juz bought me stuffed toys.
humongous 2. and one normal sized one.
one life-sized mashimaro[ew i hate mashimaro. but i lovvv the toy!]
one life-sized smiley face
and cute olive oyl

he spent 250 bucks on it man!
he shld haf juz given me the cash!!!

argh. but oh wells.
more stuffed toys! yips!

oo and he bought brandy! yuuuum.

and port. wonder what that tastes like. shall try it later.

2003-12-08T13:36:00.000+08:00
i am soo bored. tsk tsk.

sigh. went out wit my mom yesterday. gosh. the usual squabbles ALL THE WAY.

and gues what. she made me watch a freakin BOLLYWOOD show with her.

my gosh. i nearly felt like killin myself at the box office.

tsk. never feel comfortable arnd pple of my own err...race...kinda yea...

sigh. and the stupid movie

was stupid.

funny. but i din understand NOT ONE WORD.

okay fine there were subtitles.
but still.

fulla' crap.

NEVER AGAIN.

2003-12-06T21:29:00.001+08:00

Normally, people can stand a certain
amount of very bad & even excruciating pain.

whether from a physical injury, or an internal
disease like cancer

.

from a life circumstance - loss of a job
or home

.

or from losing a loved one through death
or divorce.

But after a while, pain wears on us.

Often, normal people in constant pain for
an extended length of time will
begin to think of suicide even though
they never thought of it before.

----

2003-12-06T21:29:00.000+08:00
whoop-de-doo.
juz came back frm church!
deadbeat.
errs. went to bras basah b4 that. bought loads of stuff. :)
and church today was fantastic. ahhas.yeehaw.

tsk havent packed my room yet. sigh
shall go do it later n start on my homework man.

hmm. wonderin bt xmas pressies.

2003-12-05T11:47:00.002+08:00
oookays. christa juz got voted out!
sigh.
oh well. if darrah wins i'll be happy.

2003-12-05T11:47:00.001+08:00
msg to asshole bro:
diss me on someplace where i actually read okay.
and btw,
im really ashamed.
to have u
in my blood stream

but not to worry
you'll be out
VERY SOON.

in the meantime
don come home
juz get the fuck outta my life

and leave me ALONE.

2003-12-05T11:47:00.000+08:00
honestly, dont read on. its a borinnn entry. :p

yays.
@ last. ive organized half of my room. :)
havent arranged it yet. but its a start.

and thought up my schedule for the rest of dec.
includin hmwk.
yeehaw.
tsk tsk.

tuition later. must go do hmwk. sigh and again. i forgot how 2 do it. gonna die.

hmms. i thnk i revel in bein a geek. makes me feel less guilty abt how ive spent my life this yr. wastin it and not studyin AT ALL. tsk. its a wonder i managed 2 pass my overall. tho its a bare pass. but whatever.

shall aim to get 16 pts PREFERABLY LESS for my o's.

and if i don keep 2 my schedule. i shant forget it. go back 2 it the next day no matter how hectic.

yay.

and yea. matrices matrices.

tsk. shall go get my stationery stuffs tmr at bras basah.

yeps.

and on sun. im gonna island-wide shoppin!
cant wait.

*sings ''im gonna find new togas,im gonna find new togas''

okay im delirious.

2003-12-03T13:57:00.002+08:00
yips.
changed my template.

2003-12-03T13:57:00.001+08:00

You're Most Like The Season Autumn ...

You're warm, and the most approachable. You have
that gentle prescence about you. People can
relate to you, and find you easy company.
However it's likely you've been hurt in the
past and it has left you scarred so things can
become rather chilly with you at times. Being
the third Season in, you're mature, trustworthy
and loyal to your friends but prone to
depression and negative thinking.

Well done... You're the shy and sensitive season :)

?? Which Season Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-12-03T13:57:00.000+08:00
nice way to spend my hols. BY FALLING SICK IN THE STOMACH/FEVER.NOT EVEN TOUCHIN ANY HOMEWORK.NOT EVEN MAKIN ANY PLANS TO DO SO SOON. NOT DOIN TUITION HOMEWORK.SERIOUS PROCRASTINATION.

worse of all. im broke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sigh sigh.

anyways. hmms.
yesterday was amusing. went back to sch to buy books wit athalia.
and err. quite a few adventures. ang mo kio and serangoon and all. ooh and bras basah. and gettin lost. lotsa times. and dunkin fries. hmm.
yeps. and this extremely cute guy. wit his mom. hahs. oh well

oooh and this funny thng happened. cos we were like enterin raffles city the mall or whatever u call it frm the side entrance. so there were like 2 guys there outside the entrance. weird pple. anyways. huge puddle of water juz outside the door. and darlin athalia juz has to stamp on it and get my slippers WET. so i screamed. and yea. one of those guys tapped me. and asked me where i got those slippers frm!!!! whahs.
guy[in thick weird danish{??} accent]: eerms excuse me miss..where u get these shoes?
me: huh?
guy: where u get these shoes?
me: my slippers? u wanna know where i bought them???
guy: yea yea
me: err. converse.
guy: huh what. issit in here?[referrin to raffles city mall]
me: not sure. don thnk so.
guy: hahs. okay thanks thanks.

WAHAHS. okay fine that was unneccesary. but i thght it was so weird. hmms

yeaaa...goin back 2 bras basah soon to get my stationery. yeeps. i waannaa do my work. see the nerd in me comin out. juz why cant i get down 2 it. really pissed at myself.

tsk tsk.

hmms. gonna force myslf to stay cooped up tmr and finish ALL my stufs.
maybe buy what else i need on sat. yea thats a plan. hmm good.

ooh and do my tuition hmwk tmr. sigh sigh.

and amelia's enjoyin herself in ozzie.

sigh.

2003-12-02T21:03:00.000+08:00
Did you see the shiny moon?
Turned into a black balloon
Just as you walked away from me

Did you see how hard I've tried?
Not to show the pain inside
Just as you walked away from me

Who painted the moon black?
Just when you passed your love back
Who painted the moon black?
Oh won't you, won't you come back?

It must have been the darkest night
Not even a star in sight
Just as you walked away from me, now

Who painted the moon black?
Just when you passed your love back
Who painted the moon black?
Oh won't you, won't you come back?

Who painted the moon black?
Just when you passed your love back
Who painted the moon black?
Oh won't you, won't you come back?
Who painted the moon?

Did you see the shiny moon?
Turned into a black balloon
Just as you walked away from me

2003-12-01T17:58:00.000+08:00
thnk this is kinda true...hmms.....

The stereotype of the poet — and the person who likes poetry — is of a weakling. Although you can find poets and poetry-lovers who aren't exactly linebackers, such a stereotype, like most, is unfair — and inaccurate. After Hamlet mistakenly kills a courtier, he decides to drag the body offstage. As he does, he lisps the following soft, sensitive, emotional line of poetry:

I'll lug the guts into the neighbor room.
Poetry. No doubt about it. It's vivid and ugly — and much poetry is, because poetry often addresses the ugly side of life.

Poets are sensitive, all right — almost all poetry seeks to make readers more alive to the world. And emotional as well, because writing and reading poetry inevitably involve our strongest passions. But soft? Only sometimes, when soft is exactly right, like this passage from "Upon Julia's Clothes" by Robert Herrick:

Whenas in silks my Julia goes,
Then, then, methinks, how sweetly flows
The liquefaction of her clothes.

Otherwise, poetry is a vigorous challenge to the mind and body.

taken frm cliffnotes.

2003-11-30T21:45:00.003+08:00
current mood:happy. yet sad
current song:leaving on a jetplane

yayyy. gonna go 2 orchard later. for some serious windowshoppin.
and guess what. im goin alone. YIPS! :)

aahas. yay. i juz love shoppin alone.the feelin's liberatin. almost ethreal. ahahs.

annnd. i get to wear whatever i want. thnkin boho tmr. yeehaw.

hmms. scratch the whatever crap bout projects. thnk im tellin my mom im goin for a parttyy instead.wahey.

so psyched. lalala. but FIRST.

ive got to pack my room. later at 130.

im so hyped right now. aaaah.

hmms. the first place i'll go will be ssc. been wantin to check it out again since like forever.

thnk im insane. oh wells.

i cant wait.

2003-11-30T21:45:00.002+08:00
Basics:

Name- sharan

Birthday- 17/07

Where were you born- in a hospital.

Do you have any brothers or sisters - yea. one annoyin pest of a bro.

If so,how many and name?- one. forgot his name *smiles

Favorites:

movie- if i have to pick one. errrr. dead poets society.

tv show- frens?!

food- errr. pizza i guess

sport(s)- i don play sports. and like it that way.

band- errr. loads. rhcp n evanescence as of today.

singer- lene marlin. playin her now. nice voice. hayley westenra! thnk she's cool. joosh groban. *swoons. basically those wit a overwhelmin heavenly voice tat just sucks u in. amy lee

song- errr. who painted the moon black by hayley westenra as of now.

book- errrr. virgin suicides! nono. the wedding. by nic. sparks

reality tv show- whahas. loads. maybe temptation island.

place to be- my rooom. parkway at night. churcch. er. chillin.

vehicle- caaar!

game- game?! as in like err. ookays fine. wahatevr. fun i play. not fun i watch.

drink- martinis!!

alcoholic drink- look up.

actor- joooosh hartnett

actress- errrs. kate hudson.

candy- frutips.

magazine- looads. cleo i guess if i hafta pick.

animal- errrrr. my stuffed toy!

colour- blue/purple

holiday- xmas.

subject- err. LIT! english.history. *chem: sometimes. sigh better start lovin all. and my a math tuition hmwk! yikes. and shit ive got LOADS of homework. siiiggghhhh.

Friends:

best friend(s)- athalia. siying.adora. shirley.

most trustworthy- errrrrrs. siying.

funniest- err..i thnk athalia n jonathan when they argue. whahas.

smartest- siying/adora

dumbest- hahas. what a qn. me

prettiest- er. adora/athalia. some gal frm my church forgot her name. but she's dammn pretty. ahahs. me and adora always comment on how pretty she is. a lot. thnk she's wary of us. naah. ahahs.

hottest- errrr. adora i guess. since she's sexy and all. and i thnk jimmy's hot. 2 bad i don like him. ahhas.

most shy- errrrrrrrr. cant thnk.

most outgoing- amie. ahas. elaine.

most rebellious- hahas. ME. amelia!

bad influence- ahs. errrrrr. not gonna ans this.

one you spend the most time with- errrrrr. shanqi. now. in sch. adora i guess.

Do you have any friends who you don't really see? yeps

Who lives the farthest: errr. someone in uk. lyria.

Who's parent's would you want to have? amelia's! they're soo damn cool.

Who's brother or sister would you want to have? gosh. maybe clare's. cos i thnk her bro's hot. or shanqi's bro. soo cute..and he's like 6?! :)

What's the best place to hang out? parkwaaaaaaay.

most sensitive: err. athalia/amelia

one you have the most stuff in common with- errm. nat.

one you share the most inside jokes with- errrs. adora i guess. since we see each otehr so much.

Love Life:

Do you have a crush? ----

If so,what's his/her name? -----

DO you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? personally. relationships are : dumb.

What's his/her name?-----

How long have you been together?-----

Do you, think it will last?------

Do you believe in love? not really.

love at first sight? nope.

Have you ever been in love? wit a guy? ahahs. of course not. if not i wldnt be so skeptical rights.

Who's your ex(or first person you dated)? er.-----

Who's the first person you kissed? hahas. ben frm a1. but it was juz a freakin peck.2 pecks. whatever

This/That:

vanilla/chocolate- vanilla

rap/rock- rock

night/day- night

country/classical- er. both. but maybe more country. i loove springsteen!

eminem/xzibit- who's xzibit? er. eminem's okay. tho he's stale. 50!

simpsons/family guy- family guy? err.

hanging out/chillin- ?! chillin

tv/computer- TV. i hte the com. i love the teevee.

radio/cds- errrm. love em botth 2 bits. maybe cd's better.

phone/instant messenger- phone.

AOL/AIM- never tried aim. don get the fuss bout aol..not that gd..

alone/with friends- alone. B.L.I.S.S

basketball/hockey- ewww. none.

summer/winter- winter.

skiing/snowboarding- skiing!

horror/comedy- err. both are cool.

action/adventure- hmms. both are ncie. as lng as it keeps me at the edge of my seat. give it 2 me!

goody good/bad- bad. :)

good looking and mean/ugly but,nice- good lookin and mean. i juz love badd guys on motorcycles who hate the world. then u find the inner layer. wahhatever. thats in movies like grease. sighs.

Last Round of questions:

do you believe in god? yeps. the only One keepin me alive and makin me want to stay alive right now.

in santa? hahas. not really. but i do write 2 him

easter bunny? nopes.

tooth fairy? noopes.

If you were stuck on an island who, would you want to be on it with? josh. ahhs. if he's unavailable. rhcp's frntman.

Who wouldn't you want to be stuck in a room with? oooo. loadssa pple.

What was the worst punishment you've ever gotten? hmms. don really thnk there are ones. i usually punish myself.

If you could be anywhere right now ,where would you be? in my roooom. church honestly. sigh.

What's your most missed memory(memories)?- hahs. er. sec 1/2 yrs. *fields of innocence.

If you won the lottery ,what would you do with the money? give half 2 charity *see im not that bad. :p
and sppeennd the rest! maybe save a hundred bucks. then again, maybe not.

2003-11-30T21:45:00.001+08:00
im goin on a quizzin spree! and im gonna floooood my blog wit surveys! yay.
maybe...i shld open another blog juz for surveys. oooh wells.
i loveee surveys. doncha?

Start Time: one am

(1) Full Name: sharan kaur

(2) Date of Birth: seventeen july 88

(3) Age: 15

(4) Height: 161

(5) wheres #5?

(6) Sex: f

(7) Hair Color: brwn thnx to my split ends

(8) Eye Color: errs. brwn i guess since argh whatever. i won explain. more than thrice. :p

(9) Where do you live: sg

(10)What school do you go to: gm. as much as i hate it sometimes. wanna say. i love gm. ahhas.

(11)Astrological Sign: cancer

(12)Phone number:err. u don expect me to type it out here do you.

(13)Favorite car: as of now. a red/blue nissan cefiro.

(14)Favorite color: blluueee. purppleee.

(15)Favorite food: errr. junk.

(16)Favorite animal: eehhss. im not an animal person. dolphins.whatever. i loove my dog stuffed toy tho.

(17)Favorite scent: escada sentiment. :) *ooo yea

(18)Favorite sex position: whaha! what a qn. i'll answer this err. nt now. ahahs.

(19)Favorite dental floss:?! whahas. the one i juz used 10 mins ago.

(20)Favorite Soda: errrrrrr. ice cream soda.

(21)Favorite candy bar: ehhs. as in choc? errr. timeout

(22)Favorite perfume/cologne: escada sentiment!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(23)Favorite fast food: ehhs. macs i guess. whatevr.

(24)Favorite movie: awww.. basically anythng heavy wit a sappy love story cleverly woven in...plus point if it stars hotties....like JOSH!

(25)Favorite music: ers. loads. as of now. im listenin to rhcp a lot. and evanescence. to try discover them. not analytically. juz as musicians.

(26)Favorite restaurant: errrr. country manna.

(27)Favorite T.V. show: err. loooadsss. anythng thats my type. yeps. and gotta do wit music. or history. or teen probs. or comedy. or anythg actually if im bored.

(28)Favorite alcohol beverage: dry martinis!!

(29)Coke OR Pepsi: pepsi. i guess.

(30)Shower OR Bath: baatttttth.

(31)Brussel sprouts OR Alfalfa: ahahhas. sprouts. juz cos ive never tried alfafa.

(32)Sex on the beach OR Sand in your crotch: goodness?! what kinda qn is this. er neither please.

(33)Poop OR Pee: hahas. look above.

(34)Day OR Night: NIGHT =)

(35)Shy OR Outgoing: a lil' of both.

(36)Guys OR Girls: a girl who likes guys.

(37)No phone or No T.V.: no phone. I CANT LIVE WITHOUT THE TV! hmms.

(38)Summer OR Winter: winnnnterrr. i like gloomy dark days. aaaah bliss.

(39)Do you have a crush: ----

(40)If yes to #39, then who: ------

(41)Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend:nopes. and nv will. hahs. cos i thnk its absolutely dumb.

(42)If yes to # 41, then who+how old is he/she: -----

(43)What is it that you like in him/her: ----- but i love intense eyes on a guy tho'

(44)What is it that you dislike about him/her:----- i hate egotism...

(45)Ever kissed some: hahas. im not THAT bad. yea but err. yar whatever.

(46)If yes to #45, then who: -----------

(47)Describe your first kiss: ooohs. witt been frm a1. haas. that wasnt a kiss. was a peck. two pecks. ah.so whatever. ahas.

(48)Are you a virgin: yes. and PROUD.

(49)Did you like this survey: not really.

(50)Are you still bored: YES

End Time: 105. siggh.

2003-11-30T21:45:00.000+08:00
another quiz. YAY

1. My desktop shows:
some weird girl.lookin weird. and some guy smokin. hmms.

2. Book I'm reading:
azur like it - wendy holden. it suuucckkkssss....im 2 lazy to read it!

3. On my mouse pad:
somethng blue. wit somethng that pops up at a corner. bluee!-ish green.

4. Favorite board game:
errr. the game of life.

5. Favorite magazine:
CLEO! but honestly. as long as the mag has stuffs bout fashion.health.celebs. it was written. for ME.

6. Favorite smell:
escada sentiment. my all time faaaaaaaav.
lancome miracle
calvin klein mk1
and the white one by gucci. for the life of me i cant remember its name.

7. Least favorite smell:
errrrrrr. my bro.

8. Worst feeling in the world:
betrayal. rejection.bondage.being caught in a hole. bein let down.

9. Favorite sound:
as of now? errr. leeeettts see. ''youve got mail''.

10. First thing I think of when I wake up in the morning:
wtf. shut up and get LOST! let me sleep - what i say EVERY single morn. when im feelin normal. otherwise i'll smile. which happens like. once in eight years. im SO not a morn person.

11. Rings before I answer the phone:
3. a least.

12.Favorite color:
blluueeeeee.purple.

13. Do I like my name?:
whatever. not like i can change it.

14. I was named after:
nv met anyone who's had my name :p

15. Favorite food:
swweeeettttsssss.

16. Do I drive fast?:
sadly. i don drive. YET. i will. SOON.

17. Chocolate or vanilla?:
eww. choc sucks. unless in choc form. errr. as in. only chocs are nice. when they are like. in bars or whatever crap they come in. NOT ice cream.

18. Worst disaster I fear:
errrrrrrr. dyin in a road accident. errr. no maybe. survivin a road accident. with onne of my limbs/senses disabled. *screams NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

19. Storms, cool or scary?:
enjoyable. since they suit my mood.

20. My first car:
lets see. errrrrr. i don mind a freakin junkie 2 begin witH! ill take care of it like its my baabbyyyy. it wld be my baby. juz get me on the drivers seat. and gimmie lessons. whatever. who has time 2 waste. just gimmie the daarn wheel!

21. Dead or alive, I would like to meet:
rhcp. frntman. i have to talk 2 him. find out his inspirations and implicatns and all. amy lee wld be gd 2.

22. Zodiac sign:
cancer.

23. Favorite drink:
dry martini. with an olive. *dribbles.

24. Favorite vegetable:
errrrrr. this is gonna be harsh. the only veg i eat is tofu. and bean sprouts. so yea. :)

25. If I could have any job, it would be:
i thnk ive fnd my callin in the fashion industry. or somewat. plaayyywrightin.

26. Hair, long or short:
shoooorttttttt.

27. Times I've been in love:
.....as of now im in lovvee wit 'e nissan cefiro i saw this morn in clementi. aaahhhhhhh!

28. Glass, half-empty or half-full:
whatever.

29. Do I type with my fingers over the right keys?
who cares. most of the time. but i don do the weird typin thngy wich pple use. weeiiird. who memorises keys on the keyboard. sigh

30. Favorite movie:
virgin suicides. juz read the bk again. *jooosshhhh..

31. What's under my bed?:
errr. dust. and my own personal litter.

32. Lucky number:
crap.

33. Favorite sport to watch:
women's volleyball! guys beach volleyball. ahah. not the vb in our sch. j/k. i know they rock. rock on!

34. PC or Mac:
sigh. i won ans this. i hate EVERYTHIN to do wit coms. and tell me exactly. what the hell is a freakin mac. u mean mackintosh. or somethng weird. whatttever.

35. On my nightstand:
my coaaat. incase i get cold

36. Pillows on my bed:
one. limp one. i gotta get a new one. i diig xtra soft pillows!

37. In case of fire, I'll take:
stuffedd tooyy. handphoneee.as many accesories i can grab. nono. i wont. and claim money. and buy moooree later! woohoo!

38. I admire:
superficials. sigh. dead pple.

39. Best thing ever invented:
def not the internet. infact. its the WORST. after report books. sigh.

40. Most influential person:
shakespeare. he practically invented love.

41. Favorite place(s):
my rrrooooooom. and parkway @ night. church. errrs. yea.

42. Do I say my prayers?:
*bends down in guilt. once a week?!

43. Minutes I spend in the shower:
errr. at leaassssst 30 mins. if i have my way. an hour plus. wonder what i do. hmms.

44. Most prized possession:
err. my box. of memoirs. and poems. which i thnk im gonna throw soon. *hah.

45. My best asset:
i'd like 2 thnk. my nails. gosh u can do soooo much wit them! as in nail art. *soundin airheaded...MY BRAIN. COS IT ENABLES ME TO. USE IT. AND BE BRAINY. whatever.

46. Jewellery I wear:
only 4 piercings. I WANT MORE. on my ears only. 2 more. that'll make me happy.

47. Coke or Pepsi:
errrs. now. pepsi.

48. What I have for breakfast:
this morn? i woke up at 11. used the damn com. thn since i was soo damn bored. i went back to sleep and woke at 3. so yarrrr.

49. Favorite time of the year:
december. jan.

50. If I were a cartoon character, I would be:
err. honestly. the girl in the jackie chan cartoon. play wit all the weird talismans and stuff. cool. but erm. second choice. SPONGEBOB!!!!!!!! or maybe patrick. naaahs. squidwertt!!!!!!

51.Have you ever been in love?
wit the caaarrrrrrrr. sigh.

52.How do you know its love?
whahahaha. erm cos. lol. i looove the carrr! i juz know ya noe *winks

53.What makes you fall in love?
errrrrrrr. EYES. minus pride.

54.What if your girlfriend/boyfriend is a bad kisser?
does grinch style:''bye bye. :) j/k.

55.What turns you on (at 1st sight)?
eeyyyesssssssssssssssssssss. intensity's my game. errr. yar whatever.

56.Are you the jealous type?
yea. but i get over it fast. yep.

57.Body or brains?
boooth.

58.Do looks matter?
*harsh reality. yar.

59.What turns you off?
pride. egootism. gosh.

60.The perfect date?
anythng outdoorsy. at night. ooooo. sttaaarssssss.

61.What do you have that will make a person fall for u?
errrrrr. ---?

62.Do you still believe in courtship?
i thnk its sweet. cute lar. turnon! yea.

63.Flowers or chocolates?
errr. both are sweet. but roses. rock. i juz love roses. im a rose person.

64.Kiss on the first date?
errr.

65.Sex on the first date?
noooo

66.What would you do if you find out that your girlfriend/ boyfriend is cheating on you?
does the grinch thng again *bye bye. but goodness. iwon even get in a relationship. cos i don believe in em. so yar.

67.Have you ever cheated on someone?
nioopes.

68.Fling or long term relationship?
errrrr.as of now.fling. haha. u get the gd stuffs. and byee to the commitment shit.

69.What do you think of holding hands in public?
egotism. and insecurity. if u crave it. whatever.

70.What do you think of kissing in public?
all ya need is a camera. and ure up for an oscar fr best kiss. SO MAKE IT GD AND MAKE IT LONG

71.What if your girlfriend/boyfriend is a smoker?
sigh. grinch again. *bye bye.

72.Ever fell in love with a friend of the same sex?
im honestly straight. and i looov that. er. yaar. but i don thnk there's anythng wrong wit bein gay/les. yar. as in thats their stuffs. yipps.

73. What would a guy have to do to win your heart?
intennnsee eyes. basically. intense all rnd. intelligent. n cute buns. wahha. *mark. this is my way now! whahas.

2003-11-30T11:35:00.002+08:00
i dont need you
i dont need him
i dont need them
ive accustomed

my soul accustomed to loneliness
used to betrayal
craves rejection
desires insanity

longing to be saved
longing to be free
but it gives up too much
i wont succumb

my soul
is mine
not for sharing
not for discussing
not for perceiving
not for admiring
not for analysing
not for desiring
not for loving

just abuse, loathe
my life
ive accustomed.

2003-11-30T11:35:00.001+08:00
hah. in 1 of my dammnin moods again. whatever. guess ive juz pushed everyone away.im not really sorry,
i know pple tell me i had ''everythng''. maybe last yr. maybe sec 1.
oh wellll
i pushed it all away.
now ive got nothin
cept superficiality.
maybe all i haf left is God.

i like it this way. solitude
better than PERCEPTIONS>
EXPECTATIONS.
BONDAGE.

im freee.
free from everyone's lies.

free frm everyone.

its a nice feeling.
new.
but nice.

don need anyone. juz christ.
---------------------------------------
tourniquet - evanescence
i tried to kill the pain
but only brought more
i lay dying
and i'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal
i'm dying praying bleeding and screaming
am i too lost to be saved
am i too lost?

my God my tourniquet
return to me salvation
my God my tourniquet
return to me salvation

do you remember me
lost for so long
will you be on the other side
or will you forget me
i'm dying praying bleeding and screaming
am i too lost to be saved
am i too lost?

my God my tourniquet
return to me salvation
my God my tourniquet
return to me salvation

my wounds cry for the grave
my soul cries for deliverance
~~will i be denied Christ~~
tourniquet
my suicide

2003-11-30T11:35:00.000+08:00
maybe im in denial.
i don care.
i'll live in my imaginary world.
protected frm everyone else.

don wanna let go again.
i'll never let go again.

damn perceptions.

2003-11-29T13:08:00.003+08:00
current mood:pisseeedd off.
current song:if we are the body.

aaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!
im sooooo dammmn piisseeeeeed!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
i really gotta stop doin this.

seriously thnkin of closin this blogg thngys. hmms.

argh. im still pissedd at . whatever.

2003-11-29T13:08:00.002+08:00
aaaahhh im so high right now.
but im so confused.

and im in a fix. someone telll meeeeeeeee whats my proooblleeemmm.
aaahhh! :) im juz so happy.
i really wonder why.

er.
could it be. nahs.
my gosh.

im caaauuughhhtt.....
connnffuuuseeeedddddd...

and spoutin crap!
*screams AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2003-11-29T13:08:00.001+08:00
i am BORED.
sooo bored.
nat, im not sure if u cant still come over n use my com. cos me and my bro had a HUGE fight. and so my mom's like. whatever.

sigh missed church again 2day. had some sorta slight quarrel wit my fren. sigh. who blames adora. i mean adora has nothin 2 do wit it. i mean i know i shld go even if adora doesnt. but i juz feel kinda weird. i know lots of pple there v. ncie to me and take care of me and all. but my ''ex-church''. horrific experience. really taught me that some pple are really selective. and horrible. how horrible cliques can be. no offense or whatever.but im kinda pissed they still can send me some fuckin letter invitin me 2 some stupid camp. like i wanna go. SUPERFICIALL. cannnt stand it. noooo offence honestly. but i hate the pple there. not all lah. but everyone. actually. everyone but one person. i hateeee that church.a lot!!!!! wonder if i'll get over this.hate them for makin me feel this way bt churches.sigh whatever. *thnk forgive forgive. fat hope. :p.

anyways ya. adora has her reasons....so don be too hard on her ok? tryyyy understand. and be patttiieeennnt lah fren.
@ least she's goin next week. :) yaay. i thnk athalia's comin 2. yep. and juz wanna say a huggge thnx to fcbc. for everythng :) luuv ya. i thnk i shld shut up.

goin kl tmr. or jb. sighhh. shoooppp. and get xmas pressieesss! wit my momma's cash. yippieee.

sigh this is gonna irritate[like i care]. buut whatever. im still not done wit the topic on superficiality. in school. haha.
but oh wells.
gonna leave next yr so better make the most of it. maybe ive been too mean this past. er 3 yrs.
but then again. i won change :) don wanna be one of them. don wanna change so i can fit in. cos i don wanna be like them! lalala.

so actually. yay im done.

2003-11-29T13:08:00.000+08:00
Name: sharan
Single or taken? single.

Eye color: hidden by specs. so whatever. :)

Height: 161. pathetiiiiccccally short.

Hair: uuuggggllllyyyy.[despite what kyer thnks ;)]

what are you wearing right now? shirt and berms.

Age: fifteen.

Where do you live? wit my parents.

Best Friend(s): erm.loads. but closest yet not as close. as in pple i know i can always count on; athalia..siying..adora..shirley...yea....and my stuffed toy!!

Who's the last person that called you? athalia.
What kind of shampoo do you use? as of now. wella.

What is your fave sport? i like watchin women's volleyball. ahah. i don play sports. nnneeever. not me.

What are you most scared of? honestly? errrm i donno....not really afraid of loneliness.....nor death.....maybe....er...i dooonoooooooooooo. gettin stung by bees?! aaaaaaaah. whatever. myself.

What are you listening to right now? all i wanna do. sheryl crow.

What car do you wish to have? porsshe. whatever. i'll be happy wit a junkie one now.

CD or TAPE? cds.

Bungee jumped? i wiiillll. i must.

Broken the law? uhuh.

Made yourself cry to get out of trouble? haha. used 2 do it all the time. but stopped cos slappin myself hurt 2 much. born mischievous. :) no wonder evry1 says i shld hav been a guy. but i'd like 2 think im not THAT heartless so :) j/k.

FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND

Red: knife.

Cow: black. mooooo.
ON GUYS FOR GIRLS TO FILL OUT (for girls only)

Boxers or briefs: briefs are grossssss. boxers are cool. ahah. but not the tight ewww huggin ones. fine ill stop.

Long or short hair: regretted cuttin. but its gonna grooowww yeaa!

Tall or short: taaaaalllllllllllllllllll.

Six pack or built arms: six pack. :) arms are a lil 2 wrestler. buut. :)

Hat or no hat? i lllivee for hats. yea whatever. a guy with a hat's cute. :) but NOOOOO cowboy. ergh.

Ears pierced or not? not pierced.

Tan or fair: tan's better.

Dimples: oooo thats cuuuteee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stubble or neatly shaved: smmmmalllll stubblle. reallly small. or clean shaven's safe.

Chocolate or white milk? white.

Root beer or Dr. Pepper?: dr pepper sucks.

Are you better at talking or listening? erm. i kinda do a lot of both so.yea.
Skiing or Boarding? noo skateboards. noooo skateboardss... NOOoooo way.

Day or Night? im a night person.

Summer or winter? winter!!!!!!!!! :) im alll for snugglin and rooastin marshmallows under a fire. ooo.

Cake or pie? cake.

Silver or gold? white gold.

Diamond or pearl? eerrs. diamond. but i donno. a nice one that's small. noooooo over the top.

Sunset or Sunrise? sunset.

Do you have any piercing? yeah. ears [4]

What's your favourite color? loads. purple.blue.black. at the mom'.

Do you wear any rings? yea :) accesories a gal's best freeennn.

Do you hate any one? hate nah. cant stand. looadsss. cant be bothered wit. even more. :) im mean.

What are your favourite bands? haha. recently. rhcp. spare me a1 pls.

What do you dream about? weird stuffs. and weird pple. and weird happenings. sometimes ordinary. but weird. donno. juz weird stuffs.

Do you have a HUGE crush on someone right now? natt.....i knoooww u like somone.....whooo isssiiitttt....telll meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Who is the loudest person you know? after loads of squealing into my ear. athalia. oo amelia 2. another similarity. :) and nat can scream. mr wong. aha.
Who's the quietest person you know? quietest? goodness.....not many...er. lemme see. maybe. erm................aaaahh i doonoooooooooo. who the hell can live bein quiet?!

2003-11-28T21:49:00.000+08:00
current mood: chrismassy!
current song:im just a nobody - williams brothers

got this poem frm mark's site.
posted it here cos i really like it. so yea. enjoy.

You hurt me
My feelings you hurt
time and again
I wonder what
what I love you for
Those cutting words
words
the lack of it
they hurt
This poem I write
with pain composed
My heart burns

It hurts
It hurts to ignore you
to pretend I don't care
This pretence
apathy on parade
burns me alive
scorched, charred
I lie in agony
It's excruciating

yay.
juz went to yuanling's hse. note to amie: i thnk she played a joke on u and me. i did not ask those dumb qns. haha. so yea. :)
err. had lotsa fun. and weird thngs happening. whenever im wit her. weird thngs happen.
hmmm.

yea. so we talked. gossiped. had this talk bout religions...mainly buddhism..christianity..and catholics...jewish n taoism.
erm. she explained her view 2 me and all. she asked me 2 change religion. as in asked me if i ever would. IM SO GLAD I STOOD MY GRND AND EXPLAINED WHY I LOVE CHRIST and everythng. but i know it isnt enough.
sooo hmms. decided to try prayin 4 her. nat: another person 2 add to our list. o man, whatever happened to our morning prayer?
i thnk we shld organize it. and yea. give shirley a pleasant surprise next yr! :)

aahhH!!!!!!!!! i havent started any homework. my room's a mess. ive got tuition hmwk. AND I FORGOT MATRICES. dammmmn. what m i supposed to do.
sighhh. hate my dumbness.
but oh well.
whatever.
hope i'll get rnd to doin it tonight. and stop caring bout the UGLY state of this stupid blog thngy. arrgh.

aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh IM IN THE XMAS MOOOOOODDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~lets put christ back in xmas

juz love xmas.makes me feel so dreamy n full of wonder and imagination of next yr. and new hopes and dreams. and wishes. resolutions.
and i really wanna look back next yr feelin proud of myself that ive done MY BEST STUDYIN MY ASS OFF for olvls.
i am so scared.
sigh sigh.

what is my problem. oh wells.
survivor's on..gotta go! *hugs and kisses!

and have a merry xmas!

2003-11-28T11:47:00.001+08:00
mercyme - word of God speak

I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say

CHORUS
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak

I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice

REPEAT CHORUS 2x

I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay

2003-11-28T11:47:00.000+08:00
current mood:f.r.u.s.t.r.a.t.e.d
current song: mercy me - word of God speak.

whatver.
as long as this is up and it LOOKS HALF DECENT.argh who'mi kidding. it sucks.
sigh and the daaarrrrrrn tagboard's down.
and i haf no mood to even TRY figure out the problem.
so out of anger. I DELETED THE ENTIRE THING :)
gosh im so proud of myself.
so yea.
i'll figure out somethng.
if i cant. i go 2 my cuz.
she's a whiz.
come 2 thnk of it.
i'll go to her NOW.
tata.

2003-11-26T15:17:00.005+08:00
another quiz: 51 preferences

1. Pierce your nose or tongue?
tongue.

2. Be serious or be funny?
ehs. a LOT of both.more funny.

3. Boxers or briefs?
hahs. briefs: gross

4. Whole or skim milk?
i don drnk milk.

5. Single or Taken?
single. oh what i prefer to be? single duh =)

6. Simple or complicated?
complicated. but then again. simple has less. er complications. whatever

7. Law or anarchy?
honestly, anarchy. actually no. monarchy.

8. Flowers or angels?
erm. roses.

9. Grey or gray?
gray.

10. Read or write?
luv 'em both 2 bits

11. Color or black-and-white photos?
depends on what theyre of.

12. Sunrise or sunset?
sunset. :)

13. M&M's or Skittles?
skittles.

14. Rap or rock?
err. rhcp. :) only CERTAIN ones tho.

15. Stay up late or wake up late?
i'd like not 2 sleep. but goodness. obv if u sleep late u wake up late right? whatever. that goes for me..er ok. it shld go for evryone. i hope

16. TV or Radio?
TV!!!!!!!!!!!!!cant live without it!!!!!! radio's cool in my room alone.

17. Is it POP or SODA?
soda.*what kinda qn is this

18. X or O in Tic-tac-toe?
x.

20. Eat an apple or an orange?
ehs. grapes

21. What came first the chicken or the egg?
ers. don care. but whatever. egg since the chick's born frm it.

22. Hot or Cold?
cold. I LOVE THE CHILL!

24. Tall members of the opposite sex or short?
tall. but not THAT tall.

25. Sun or moon?
moon. i lov the dark sky.

26. Emerald or ruby?
ruby! my birthstone. ahhas.

28. Left or right?
er. i use my left brain much much more.

29. 10 acquaintances or 1 best friend?
errrrrrrr. 10 best frens and 1 acquaintance. i don like 2 limit myself.

30. Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream?
vanilla!

31. High or Drunk?
errrrs. high. the drunk part sucks.

32. Green beans or carrots?
ewwwwwwww. none.

33. Low fat or fat free?
errrs. both usually taste gross. nat: yoghurt sucks!

34. What is your biggest fear in the world?
losing it. losing me.

35. Pink or Red?
errrr. both okay lar.

36. Kids or no kids?
kids. adopted kids. don want my kids to turn out like me. spare em the sufferin of my genes :)

37. Cat or dog?
dawg.

38. Half empty or half full?
saaaame.

39. Mustard or ketchup?
mustard!!

40. Hard cover books or soft cover books?
hard cover. tho they weigh A TON

41. Newspaper or magazine?
im a mag addict. papers are alright. if they're tabs.

42. Sandals or sneakers?
ew. none. thongs.

43. Wonder or amazement?
amazement. i thnk and wonder TOO much.

44. Red car or white car?
black. metallic blue. fine white.

45. Happy and poor or sad and rich?
read my compo.

46. Singing or dancing?
ehs.

47. Hugging or Kissing?
ers. i kinda. aah whatever.

48. Corduroy or plaid?
ewwww. NONE. but if i haf 2 choose. corduroy. yuck!

49. Happy or sad?
i don care. contented.

50. Purple or green?
royal purple! :)

51. A year of hot sex or a lifetime of
friendship?
whahahs. frenship. woah a YEAR of sex can be compared to a LIFETIME of frenships. hmmms.

2003-11-26T15:17:00.004+08:00
this is the cutest sng i have ever heard. this is what i can make of the lyrics.
[just a cute parody. dont be offended yar?] the funniest parts are in italics!

lets put christ back in christmas - bob and tom
chorus:lets put christ back in christmas
right back where he belongs[oh oh oh]
lets put christ back in christmas
and back in yr favourite christmas songs

frosty the snowman was jesus christ's best friend
he stood there melted by the cross until the very end [hey! cmon! ooo..]

you better not shout, you better not cry
you better not pout, i'ma tellin u why
jesus christ is comin again[okay!okay! 1 more!]

*repeat everythng in frnt
*chorus [take it back!]

jesus the long-head saviour[giggles]
had a very shiny glow
and if u ever saw him
you would call it a halo![HALO!]

lets put christ back in christmas[the true meaning of the season]
right back where he belongs[oh oh oh]
lets put christ back in christmas
and back in yr favourite
and back in yr favourite
and back in yr favourite christmas songs

jingle bells, go to hell, if u do not pray.....

[okay seriously. THIS IS THE FUNNIEST SONG!!!!!!!! but true yea. tag me if ya wanna hear it! ive got nothin better to do. *smiles]

2003-11-26T15:17:00.002+08:00
yayyyy! its up again! yippie.
tho it looks weird. ITS UP *smiles

pls dont screw me now.

erm not sure if i shld share this. but if it wld help anyone. wel erm. here goes:
er. basically. this few days..weeks...entire year...ive been feelin really insecure and hateful bt everythng. esp bout the person tht i am. so i hated everythng i was,bad pts were like magnified to the max. n yea. i juz kept on hatin and hatin. i strove for perfection. when i was unable to achieve it. i hated myself more.
so yea i lost basically all respect that ever was there for my soul.
really confused me...cos ya noe...wit bearin the name of christ...im not supposed to feel this way....which caused me to hate myself EVEN more...hah....

erm yea. then yesterday. i felt this pain in my ear again. erm its been buggin me for quite awhile. somethng told me that i was losing my hearing.
and erm. for those who know me. :) my ears are really impt to me. i lov the snds of the world and music and everythng. keeps me sane
so yea. tried to wave the thgt away and everythng. i cldnt.

so yea. [in between ad breaks for charmed :)] i prayed.
and the first line that came out was : God, i love everything you've given me, dont take it away pls..i value all ur gifts 2 greatly..

so then that got me thinking. as in. why was i able to say somethng like that...so contradictory to what i was feelin...for like...forever?
so i thgt and thgt. and i realised i love me for being me.
erm yea. sooo many bad stuffs bout me. yea but there must be ONE thng thats good right? so i'll juz capitalize on that. and keep on tryin to improve myself. but not in the self-depreciating way.

my ears are as valuable as my character. my soul.my being. and yea. there's all so priceless...i cld never ever wish for more...these defy all laws of logic..they make their own...
they're me.

and not 2 sound cliche or preachy or anythng...but they're free. for everyone.
and if u haf SO MANY priceless thngs bout u. u must be priceless not worthless right.

LOVE YRSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

woah yea. anyone wanna like...ya noe...discuss it wit me...tell me kaes...im still discoverin to love myself...yea n........peace.

2003-11-26T15:17:00.000+08:00
current mood: fed up
current song:under the brigde - red hot chili peppers

THTS IT.
i hattte the fuckin com.

cant this damn thng listen to me for once. or juz do what i fuckin want. thgt humans were irritating and idiotic.

hah. this bloody com surpasses it all

and this stupid fren. i don care if u read it. i did everything so nicely for her! wit the careless click on one fuckin link. she deletes everything. and jams up my entire com. and MY FUCKIN brain. and life.

aaaah. whatever.
sorry 4 the pledge i made on no cussing on this damn blog.

changed my mind.

2003-11-24T23:24:00.000+08:00
current mood:tired
current song:that thng you do

hope this thng doesnt screw up again. oh well.
juz came back frm class chalet @ east coast. haha. amazingly it was really fun.
esp since like we crammed in frnt of the tv to watch holland v and juz gorged and gorged and gorged. ahah. ate LOADS.[ elaine, i suggest, dont go on. haha.]
and to torture u guys, what i ate :) :
2 chicken wings
3 sausages[not the melvyn kind ;)]
3 satay thngys
and 3 cups of rose syrup

yippee. tmr gonna watch le divorce. finally. wonder if shld go back chalet.
ahah.
2bad din stay over. bt oh wel, only guys did.
~so yea these are the pple who went. of what i remember:
me. adora. mark. alvin chua. shenghui. alvin then. chin hang.amos.wenhuai.melvyn.lingying.shuwen.shuhui.aizhu.gektheng.juli.amanda koh.isabella. brendan. hilda.liting.alisia.geraldine.bee eik.lynette.peifen.shuyi.huineng.

yeaaa. :) and i learned how 2 start a fire! east coast beach is beeeautifooool man.

oo yea and we wanted to call renee and wish her happy b/d[super-on class.sigh]but we cldnt contact her. aaah sad sad

I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY FORGOT TO BRNG CHAMPAGNE.

the only spoiler.
next time i don care. im bringing. vodka. AND IM BUYING OLIVES. white wine. and haha. juz for a kick. loads of coke.grapefruit soda. and panadol. fuuun.
hmms. helps havin a dad who owns a bar. and nice workers who feed u wit their ''inventions'' and don tell yr dad. *smiles.

ookays im not makin sense again. oh well.

HAPPY B/D RENEE

2003-11-23T19:06:00.001+08:00
how appropriate.

cant take that away - mariah
They can say anything they want to say
Try to bring me down
But i will not allow
Anyone to succeed
Hanging clouds over me

** (and) they can try hard to make me feel
That i don't matter at all
But i refuse to falter
In what i believe
Or lose faith in my dreams

* 'cause there's a light in me
That shines brightly
They can try
But they can't take that away from me
(from me)

They, they can do anything they want to you
If you let them in
But they won't ever win
If you cling to your pride
And just push them aside
See i,
I have learned there's an inner peace i own
Something in my soul
That they cannot possess
So i won't be afraid
And darkness will fade
(repeat *)

No, they can't take this
Precious love
I'll always have inside me
Certainly the lord will guide me
Where i need to go

They can say anything they want to say
Try to break me down
But i won't face the ground
I will rise steadily
Sailing out of their reach

Oh lord
(repeat **/*)

2003-11-23T19:06:00.000+08:00
current mood:pffffffft
current song: mariah - cant take that away

i thgt parents were supposed to love.
HAH.
my mom. i blindly believed for 15 yrs. DID.
sure there were sighns but i juz attributed it 2 the fact that she was human
wrng again
she hates me for everythng i am.
yeah.
hates the fact that i see thru her lies.
hates the fact that im not the perfect daughter.
hates the fact that im not ''the answer 2 her prayers''.

aaah. now she decides to come clean.
EVERYTHNG IS CLEAR.

btw for skeptics. moms who live to see bad stuffs happen to their daughters. DON love their daughters.

at least ive got my stuffed toy.
wonder when she'll decide 2 throw me out. hmmm.
why am i so nochalant about this?
argh whatervr

2003-11-23T12:32:00.008+08:00
frm bored.com

1. Name? sharan
2. Were you named after anyone? eh. don thnk so
3. Do you wish on stars? sometimes. in the morn when im walkin. but now they covered up the beautiful place.sigh.
4. Which finger is your favorite? second. most ''useful''
5. When did you last cry? a long long time ago. i hate cryin.
6. If you were making a movie about yourself, who would play you? oooooh.erm.i think i'll play myself. josh hartnett/matthew mconaughey'll get the romantic male lead. argh hack make it a triangle. :) ooo yea.
. Do you like your handwriting? not really. but im stickin wit it.
8. Who do you admire? ehh, john mellencamp. :)
11. Any bad habits? twirlin my hair. and babblin. and PROCRASTINATING. :p
12. If you were in love, would you say it? er. depends.
13. Have you ever told a secret you swore you wouldn't tell? yea. but ive gotten muuuch better now. :)
14. If you were another person, would you be friends with you? nah.
15. Have you ever stolen anything? frm a store??? eeehhh. ooh that time i left this place w/o payin for my drink. they forgot 2 count it! since i'd paid for everythng else. so heh. :) meaan me. but i was broke. so cldnt haf paid for it anywyas.
16. Do looks matter? depends. but on the whole yea.
17. When was the last time you wanted to punch someone? yesterday
18. Have you ever met anyone famous? eh yeps. hah.
19. Do you think there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? grew outta that.
20. Are you trendy? dont know. dont care.
21. How do you prevent anger? i dont.
22. Are you passive or aggressive? a lil' of both. more aggresive actually.
23. Who is your idol? sigh. no one actually. oooh the frntman of CULTURE CLUB. ahah.
24. Who is your second family? i have a second family?
25. Do you trust others easily? i don trust pple. :) i trust my stuffed dog! :) he knows evrythn.
26. What was your favorite toy as a child? all my toys. :) loved every 1 of them all special. :)
27. What class in high school did you think was totally useless? ooh.
lets start wit a math.put in math as well. physics. who the hell cares if p=fa or not. NOT ME. ooh and chem. sigh its fun. BUT DUMB.malay. i converse in english.thats enuf.basically. everythng's dumb. except lit. and english. [that felt good.]
28. Do you like sappy love songs? love me - collin raye. yea i do. but not all.
29. Have you ever been on radio or television? erm. radio yea.waay back last yr and sec 1. tv? nah. me and ath passed on an interview once. actually i did. :) and another time we[sorry i again]avoided those damn cameras when they were at like. somewhere. watever. im not makin sense.
30. Have you ever intentionally hurt someone emotionally or physically? my bro.
31. Do you like sarcasm? i breathe off it.
32. Have you ever been in a mosh pit? nopes.
33. Do people understand you most of the time? they think they do. LET THEM *evil laugh
34. Would you rather have a sore throat or an upset stomach? i get sore throats every morn. so yea. an upset stomach wld be a comfortin change.
35. Have you thought seriously about committing suicide? yea. but it spoils the fun of findin out how u'll die eventually.
36. Could you be a vegetarian? i do not eat veg.
37. Would you ever bungee jump? ooohh yea i will :)
38. What are your nicknames? sairleen. wahah.[courtesy of taff] and shar. yeps.
39. Do you untie your shoes every time you take them off? i cant find the darn knot.
40. Do you ever wear overalls? at home. when im really bored. i change my clothes. often.
41. What bothers you the most about females? hah. RESPECT for themselves.
42. What bothers you the most about males? black hearts. and when they whine. uggh.
43. If you were to leave on a trip tomorrow,where would you go? siberia.to get away frm everythng.
44. Do you use scented body soaps? love 'em.
45. Do you think you are strong? nup
46. What's your favorite Popsicle? the rainbow one. aaha.
50. Age: fifteen
51. Sex: f
52. Favorite color: purple. blue.
53. Eye Color: my eye colour of my fav eye eolour? erm. 1) brwn. 2.silver
54. Do you have a driver's license? I WILL
55. What time is it? 418
LAST PERSON WHO…
56. You went to the movies with? errrrrr. what the hell was the last movie i watched? oh erm. siying i thnk.
57. You went to the mall with? athalia. and yuanling.
58. How many kids do you want? 3. i wanna adopt man. :)
59. Who should pay for dinner? im broke. so ANYONE WHO HAS LOADS OF CASH AND A BIIIG HEART.
60. Who do you see yourself marrying in the future? donno if i believe in marriage. actually. i dont. but for the record, a guy.
61. What is your favorite name of a child? josh.
62. How many people have you kissed? hah. im supposed 2 count?
63. What color is your toothbrush? blue.

aww its over? darrn.

2003-11-23T12:32:00.007+08:00

Which Clueless Chick are you? Find out!

2003-11-23T12:32:00.006+08:00

Which Holiday are YOU? Find out @ RelentlessDivas.Net!

2003-11-23T12:32:00.005+08:00

Which Female Buffy Character are you? Find out!

2003-11-23T12:32:00.004+08:00

What Nervous Habit are You? Find out!

2003-11-23T12:32:00.003+08:00

Which Kid's TV Character are You?Find out!

2003-11-23T12:32:00.002+08:00

Which Britney are you? Find out!

2003-11-23T12:32:00.001+08:00

Which Part of a Meal Are You?Find out!

2003-11-23T12:32:00.000+08:00
(You’re supposed to take the description of those born in your birth month, then strike out the characteristics which don’t describe you at all & bold those which applies to you especially.)

JULY:
Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. ~~Quiet unless excited or tensed.~~ Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. ~~Easily consoled.~~ Honest. Concerned about people’s feelings. ~~Tactful.~~ Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. ~~Not revengeful.~~ Forgiving but never forgets. Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others ~~physically and~~ mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. ~~Hardworking.~~ ~~No difficulties in studying.~~ Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Likes to be quiet. Homely person. Waits for friends. ~~Never looks for friends.~~ Not aggressive unless provoked. Prone to having stomach and dieting problems. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.

wow. basically. this thng is me. denial :)

2003-11-22T20:32:00.001+08:00
somethngs wrong wit my daaamn blog
the date and time's all comin 0ut wrong
goin backwards.
this is like the latest post/
yet u see it like below.
ARGH.
everythng's fuckin wrong.

2003-11-22T20:32:00.000+08:00
okays. juz spent like forever frm 11 till nw: 530 watchin tv. with some com hrs in btwn. i so need a life.
tmr class chalet. tell me why im feelin. whats the word. argh hack. BAD.
sigh. i hate 32. really. and i know this person says tat she'll be there for me and stuffs. and that im her only fren. but i know she'll drop that in a sec.
sigh and i don wanna go there wastin time. done tht enough already. but what else m i supposed 2 do. arrghh.
whatever. wonder why im gettin so worked up cos of this sh*t.
its been happenin since 1st day of sch.
i hate this yr. REALLY HATE.
turned my life upside down. really badly upside down
everythng that shldnt happen did.
everythng bad i din even dream of happened.
arghhhhhh. i don even know how
i fnd out 2 late.
horrible. i don even know who to blame. arrrgghhhhhhh.
sick and tired of blamin myself and puttin up a fake extremely happy frnt.
guess im tryin 2 make u see i have the perfect life
i know u thght so.
but guess u fnd ur way now
by takin my old life. and makin it yrs.
i really hate u. then again i dont.
arrgh.

2003-11-21T21:37:00.006+08:00

The Completely Pointless Personality Quiz

2003-11-21T21:37:00.005+08:00
I AM: here
I WANT: 2 be me
I HAVE: DETERMINATION. [actually i don. i juz haf to cultivate that darrn habit]
I WISH: *for world peace
I HATE: veg. copycats.shamelessness.posers.aaah whatevr. fights.
I MISS: innocence
I FEAR: dyin 2 early
I HEAR: *only the gd stuffs. which is inaccurate too but whatevr.
I SEARCH: to understand life. and Jesus.
I WONDER: what my use is. how my life will turn out. will any of my fantasies
come true
I REGRET: fallin. slackin. actually no i dont. taught me gr8 stuffs.
I LOVE: Christ. who's basically the only one i truly love.
I ACHE: in my neck. strain.
I ALWAYS: either talk 2 much. or say 2 little
I AM NOT: AN AIRHEAAADDDDD.
I DANCE: or maybe not.
I SING: to pass time. and 2 see if it'll crack glass panes.
I CRY: only to myself or God. no one besides my family's seen me cry. :) im proud of that.
I AM NOT ALWAYS: cheerful...happy...hyper. ive got down moments too ya noe
I WRITE: crap. i don care.
I LOSE: contrl of my tongue.
I CONFUSE: evryone. literally.
I NEED: a vacation. a personal butler.
I SHOULD: so shut up

2003-11-21T21:37:00.004+08:00

You are Form 9, Vampire: The Undying.

"And The Vampire was all that remained on
the blood drowned creation. She attempted to
regrow life from the dead. But as she was
about to give the breath of life, she was
consumed in the flame of The Phoenix and the
cycle began again."

Some examples of the Vampire Form are Hades (Greek)
and Isis (Egyptian).
The Vampire is associated with the concept of
death, the number 9, and the element of fire.
Her sign is the eclipsed moon.

As a member of Form 9, you are a very realistic
individual. You may be a little idealistic,
but you are very grounded and down to earth.
You realize that not everything lasts, but you
savor every minute of the good times. While
you may sometimes find yourself lonely, you
have strong ties with people that will never be
broken. Vampires are the best friends to have
because they are sensible.

Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-11-21T21:37:00.003+08:00

You are a lipid. You know whom you like and whom
you hate, and you like hanging out with people
who think like you do. People who disagree with
you annoy you to no end. You either love
Abercrombie and Fitch or you despise it, but
there's no middle ground. You're polar.

Which Biological Molecule Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-11-21T21:37:00.002+08:00
luka - suzanne vega
My name is Luka
I live on the second floor
I live upstairs from you
Yes I think you've seen me before

If you hear something late at night
Some kind of trouble. some kind of fight
Just don't ask me what it was
Just don't ask me what it was
Just don't ask me what it was

I think it's because I'm clumsy
I try not to talk too loud
Maybe it's because I'm crazy
I try not to act too proud

They only hit until you cry
And after that you don't ask why
You just don't argue anymore
You just don't argue anymore
You just don't argue anymore

Yes I think I'm okay
I walked into the door again
Well, if you ask that's what I'll say
And it's not your business anyway
I guess I'd like to be alone
With nothing broken, nothing thrown
Just don't ask me how I am [X3]

2003-11-21T21:37:00.001+08:00

Your element is Water. You are a deep person and a
good communicator. Incredibably loving and
loyal when your trust is gained and you are
fairly mature.Myterious to the utmost water is
in everything. One can be an Ocean or a river
but nobody truly knows you.

What's your element
brought to you by Quizilla

Fight Club!

What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

You are Psalms.

Which book of the Bible are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-11-21T21:37:00.000+08:00
I AM SOOO INSPIRED.
wow. i love mr chia. made me see the trrrue beauty of the english lang. which i used 2 think was crap.
words are like. powerful. WOW. enlightened man.
HE HAS TO TEACH ME NEXT YR!!!! they say: mrs kaan: f41, f43. MRCHIA: f42[YAY!!!!!!!!!!], f44. de souza:f45.
hmm. really hope it turns out this way man. gimmie a GREAT english teacher. sick of crappy ones:
2001: mrs poon.
2002:ms ong
2003:mdm sng.
*phleck.

looove shakespeare in love. SO PURE. :) so pure till it almost seems perverse. amaaazing.

watched the bachelor. so glad i finally found out the person i was this yr. yea. still learnin stuffs bout myself but ive got my entire life. KIRSTEN IS ONE DUMB AIRHEAD. sigh. i'll use her as an inspiration. i sssoo do not wanna end up like her. fakin reality. to get what she ''wants''. gross.
and yay! SURVIVOR STARTIN..
my entire life is planned round the tv man.
hmm :)

my bro's like gonna get back his results tmr. whhhahahahahhahaha. wonder how he'll do. wonder if he'll get into express.

i really wish this thngy could be like private. there're some thngs u juz hafta tell someone...u don trust any of yr frens. but u cant like freakin keep it in any lonnnger! i don wanna faaake. :p[think airhead kirsten, AIRHEAD KIRSTEN]

fine fine. i know im soundin like an airhead right now.
oh wells
-------------------------------------------------------------------
love me - collin raye
I read a note my grandma wrote back in nineteen twenty - three.
Grandpa kept it in his coat, and he showed it once to me. He said,
"Boy, you might not understand, but a long, long time ago,
Grandma's daddy didn't like me none, but I loved your Grandma so. "

We had this crazy plan to meet and run away together.
Get married in the first town we came to, and live forever.
But nailed to the tree where we were supposed to meet, instead
Of her, I found this letter, and this is what it said:

If you get there before I do, don't give up on me.
I'll meet you when my chores are through;
I don't know how long I'll be.
But I'm not gonna let you down, darling wait and see.
And between now and then, till I see you again,
I'll be loving you. Love, me.

I read those words just hours before my Grandma passed away,
In the doorway of a church where me and Grandpa stopped to pray.
I know I'd never seen him cry in all my fifteen years;
But as he said these words to her, his eyes filled up with tears.

If you get there before I do, don't give up on me.
I'll meet you when my chores are through;
I don't know how long I'll be.
But I'm not gonna let you down, darling wait and see.
And between now and then, till I see you again,
I'll be loving you. Love, me.
Between now and then, till I see you again,
I'll be loving you. Love, me.
-------------------------------------------------------------
gr8 song.

2003-11-20T20:49:00.001+08:00
got this frm http://gmethss.proboards16.com.
quite true. hmms.

Subject: 30 signs that you have lived too long in Singapore?

1. You think there's nothing wrong with putting chili sauce on
everything you eat.

2. You wait for instructions from people in authority before doing anything.

3 . You join queues without knowing or caring what the queue is for.

4. You can type an SMS on your phone as quickly as you would if you had a regular keyboard.

5. Your idea of a good night out consists of having dinner at a hawker centre, drinking beer, and then going another hawker centre
and eating again.

6. You've lost your ability to criticize people in higher positions than you, even if they're wrong.

7. You would buy a $20 product you don't need if it's on sale for $10, just to save money..

8. Every task you take on is incomplete without a mission statement and a cheesy slogan.

9. "Crossing the country" means taking the MRT to the end of the line.

10. You don't just know what "kiasu" means, you have become it!

11. You would cross the entire country all day to find the places that make the perfect fried noodles, or roti prata, or ice kacang or
chilli crab. And none of these places would be close to each other.

12. You have a high tolerance for nagging.

13. Most or all of these acronyms make sense to you: NUS; NTU; ERP; SDU; PAP; MRT; LKY; GCT; PRC; TIBS; SBS; SMS; JB; JBJ; AMK; AYE; PIE; ECP; ISD; ISA;, 5C's; CPF; CHIJMES; SPG; CWO.

14. You think that $100,000 is a reasonable price for a Toyota Corolla and $1,000,000 is bloody cheap for a bungalow, but $5 for a plate of fried noodles is a barbarous outrage.

15. You believe that not being able to get decent roti prata outside Singapore is enough to keep the best and the brightest people from leaving.

16. You justify every argument with the phrase "in order for us to be competitive in the 21st century".

17. You think everything should be "topped up".

18. You see nothing unusual about Trade unions spending more time owning and operating supermarkets, drugstores, amusement parks, nightclubs, and financial services outlets than planning the next strike.

19. You wear winter clothes indoors and summer clothes outdoors.

20. You're not confused by a street naming system that locates streets like Clementi Road, Clementi Street, Clementi Crescent, Clementi Lane, Clementi Drive, Clementi Way, and Clementi Avenues 1, 2, 3,4, 5, 6, and 7 all within walking distance of each other.

21.You get irritated if you don't see a sign telling you how long your wait's going to be for a bus, a train, or the expressway to
take you where you want to go.

22. You don't have a problem with four different direct payment systems spread out over seven different cards in your wallet.

23. You forgot what chewing gum tastes like.

24. You say "handphone", not "mobile" And you think there's no such thing as a handphone that's too thin.

25. You've become a fan of either Arsenal, Man. U., or Liverpool when you barely knew what soccer was before you came to Singapore.

26. You go to a buffet table and put a lot of food on your plate. And must do it quick, wait other people take.

27. When something went wrong, big or small, you expect the government to sort things out.

28. You don't think it's rude when your lunch companion answers her "handphone" and instead of saying "I'm having lunch at the moment, can I call you later?" she has a 10 minute conversation right in front of you.

29. You believe that paper napkins are a valuable commodity that nobody in their right mind would provide customers free of charge.

30. You are unable to say "NO" and always replace it with "CANNOT".

WHAHAHHAHAHAHA.

2003-11-20T20:49:00.000+08:00
aaaaaaaaahh had fun today.
after sch..went out wit athalia and yuanling. haha. funny.
then later ath and me went 2 spotlight. tried on makeup..glitter. but tthe highlight: CASH CONVERTERS!!!!
they haf like GREAT cds! for only freakin 5 bucks!!!!
mannn. its great. spent an hour lookin at the cds and all their stuffs.
me and yuanling bought some perfume frm calvin klein. 89.90. hah.
yeps.
oooh and we went 2 the library and looked at oold newspapers in the discographer!!! dammn cool. last time they had like 6 pages of ads. and the clothes. gawwwd...awful. oh wells.

yea then met my mom and bro...went pastamania. daaaaamn ffull now man. sigh sigh.
aaaah bachelor startin soon! yayyyyyy.

love calvin klein. :)
o man more homework.......sshhhhhhht.

2003-11-19T20:31:00.000+08:00
i am sooo bored. still got loooadsa homework. redo physics papers. and matrices. and more. which i cannot be bothered to remember. oh and also giv mrs loh a letter for my absence yesterday. *phleck

anyways. d/l this song yar? really cool.

you oughta know - alanis morisette
I want you to know, that I'm happy for you
I wish nothing but the best for you both
An older version of me
Is she perverted like me
Would she go down on you in a theatre
Does she speak eloquently
And would she have your baby
I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother

Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able
To make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, till you died
But you're still alive

And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

You seem very well, things look peaceful
I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know
Did you forget about me Mr. Duplicity
I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner
It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced
Are you thinking of me when you fucked her

Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able
To make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, til you died
But you're still alive

And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

Cause the joke that you laid on the bed that was me
And I'm not gonna fade
As soon as you close your eyes and you know it
And every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back
I hope you feel it...well can you feel it

And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know
------------------------------------------------
gr8 song. alanis morisette totally rocks. love her crudeness. aaha.
i am sooo sleepy. OH!!! how cld i forget.
went 2 cut my hair today. and it SUCKED. i look like some freakin chinadoll gone WRONG. baaadly wrong. stupid guy. doesnt understand that i don want my hair above my chin. aarghhh. daarrrrrn.

oh wells. hopefully it'll grow. fasst.

sigh juz cant staand ''copycats''. oh and my bro :p

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im gettin stressed for headstart again
i don wanna faaaiilll agaiin
i know i will.
BUT I DON WANNNA.
damn it.
sigh. fine. juz fail a math.
dooon faiil or get any c6 or c5 in my core subjects.
i know it depends on me.
but im like so not depend material.
aarrrghhhh.
really hope i'll buck up and get serious.
don waste my chance studyin now. don wanna spend my workin yrs tryin real hard to get a freakin mere o level cert.or a level. or dip.
whatever.
so i'll try push myself ; start studyin 3rd week of dec. homework's incl.
it has 2 work.

2003-11-18T18:37:00.001+08:00
woow. had like such a fun day.
okays so like i ponned sch..went 2 meet nat @ 730 at tam.
toook the train to suntec.
then frm there...we walked allll over and literally alll over the place[suntec..raffles place..one fullerton..marina square..sg river..asians civilisations museum] till 10:30am.
so like 3 hrs[my feet hurt..really badly]. yea saw a couple of wedding photos bein taken. and all.
loadsa tourists.
then at 10:30. we sat this bumboat ride 4 hallfff an hour. :) so dammmn cool.
then walked one whole biiiiiig round back 2 suntec. and ate marche's.
hah. then tried on clothes at topshop. funny. nat was stuck in the dressin room while i went runnin all over to find gd clothes. she llooooooved my taste, dincha? told u im gifted. j/k.
tried on this retro dress and cargos. together. really ncie. combined price: 357bucks. sigh.

oh wells. my day in like a paragraph.
ooooh! n had tuition today. :) the tutor was dammmn good. haf faith that i'll pass a math for my o level. YYYEAAAAAAAAAAA.

haha. gonna go wit adora sometime later in the week to eat marche's. again. my poor tummy. sigh.

ohhhh wells. gr8 day. spontneous field trip gone gr8. better than 4 periods of crap. :) [mrs loh din even know! hope she never does man...]

oooh yea. and we took a few photos wit my phone. haha. esp at sg river. dammmn fun. locked arms and sang top of the world. ahha. gr8.

ouch. except 4 the fact that my feet and legs. hurrrrrt really bad. applyin spray every few seconds. mannn. ouch ouch ouch ouch. might juz pon sch tmr/. hmmms/ :)

OH! and me and nat. decided to bluff athalia we were caught in a road accident. poor gal. she believed. :) haha. thnk shld tell her the truth? hmm. yea lah...shldnt be that badd. i guess.

BUMBOATS TICKET SELLERS ARE PATHETIC SALESPEOPLE{tho they charged us 1/2 price}

2003-11-18T18:37:00.000+08:00

How evil are you?

2003-11-16T16:15:00.008+08:00
haha got this frm angie's. and im gonna do it. cos im BORED.

name = sharan

piercings = 4. and gonna get 2 more soon. and i want a tongue piercing. maybe next yr? I CANT WAIT

tattoos = nah...not my kinda thng :)

height = 160. pathetic

shoe size = 6/7.

hair color =black.

siblings = younger bro. aaarrseeee.

LAST

movie you rented = ! erm. lets see. saturday night fever. whaha.
ovie you bought = hollywood homicide. [JOSH!]

song you listened to = waterfalls - tlc

song that was stuck in your head = augh. garbage's zombie.

cd you bought = ooo. looooong time ago. think it was hillsongs's hope. i soo want try this[pink]!

cd you listened to = ricky martin's compilation. groovy.

person you've called = erm. mark.
person that's called you = nat.

tv show you've watched = friends

person you were thinking of = loreennnzo. ahha.

DO

you have a crush on someone = --
you wish you could live somewhere else = uh-uh. like all the time. uk for instance. switz's cool 2. juz pls get me away frm the pacific.

you think about suicide = now and then.
you believe in online dating = no way. who the hack does it anyways.

others find you attractive = they'd be blind ;)
you want more piercings = yyeaaaa. 2 more on my ears. and one on my tongue!!!!! :) addictive man.

you like cleaning = nope. lazzy me.

you like roller coasters = yeaaa!!!! :) tho i get really freaked out.

you write in cursive or print = er. a mixture. argh whatever my handwriting's gross.

FOR OR AGAINST

long distance relationships = no comment. but. i'd go wit against.

using someone = against.
suicide = neutral.
killing people = aha. against.

teenage smoking = SMOKING IS GROSS.if u like wanna die fast. do drugs. or get run down by a car. smokin's is utterly disgustin. against.
driving drunk = against. i'll def. commit it tho. nononononon i wont. arrrgh hack.

gay/lesbian relationships = its their life. shldnt judge.

soap operas = for. :)

HAVE YOU

ever cried over a girl = erm. cried with her yes. over her...nopes..don thnk so.
ever cried over a boy = eehhm. look above. but i donno.

ever lied to someone = countless.

ever been in a fist fight = nah

ever been arrested = haha. my fren was once. and he started doin headstands in the cell. and teasin the warden. ahah.

WHAT

shampoo do you use = dove. so-so. prefer keratese.

shoes do you wear = er. i hate sports shoes. ive got a pair of mary-janes. double yuck. so yea. no shoes for me.
are you scared of = myself. hah.

NUMBER

of times I have been in love? = gosh who counts? as in don thnk i'll like fall out of it. like wit my mom/dad for instance. hmm.

of times I have had my heart broken? = that'll hurt.

of girls I have kissed? = safe to say. none. im straight.

of boys I have kissed? = heh.

of girls I've slept (in a bed) with? = goodness. oh. ahha. for sleepovers and stuffs. hmm. a few times.
of boys I've slept (in a bed) with? = zilch.
of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends = 1. but we're not even talkin now. amazingly i trust this person wit my life. hah. known him for like. 8 yrs now :)

of times my name has appeared in the newspaper? = once.
f scars on my body? = erm. 2 lazy 2 count.

of things in my past that I regret? = whatever. no use countin em

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE

pretty = well duh no. any blind fool'll see that :)

funny = only 2 myself. hah.

hot = look at 1st qn.

friendly = yea. but i do bite. :)

ugly = uh-uh.
loveable = hahs. no way man. thats like for. hello kitty or sump'n. eww.

caring = erm. haha. donno. i do like helpin pple wit their problems. but yea.

sweet = hah. me? naah.

dorky = :) i love reading.

FAVORITE:

5 letter word : erm. peace? haha.

actor/actress : josh hartnett/ kate hudson

Candy : er. sour ones.

Cartoon : johnny bravo! spongebob!
Cereal : erm. i only like honey stars. not in milk tho'.

Chewing gum : def. not chiclets.
Color(s) : puurple! bllluueeee! red. black. silver.

Color nail polish : BLACK. :)

Day of week : sat.

Least fave day : wed. mid-week crisis. always the worst. phleck.

Flower : rose. :) i dig roses.

Jello flavor : the red one. strawberry?
Jewelry : necklaces! riings. earrings.

Special skills/talents : i can talk. a lot.
Summer/Winter : winter.

Trampolines or swimming pools : trampolines. :) fuun.

PERSON WHO LAST

Slept in your bed : cousin. and doggy. wait thats not a person. arrgh hack.

Saw you cry : i don cry in frnt of pple. cept my mom.

Made you cry : er. myself? hah.

You went to the movies with : errr...lemme see. thnk it was shanqi.

Yelled at you : mom. [what the hack u doin on the com at 1am?!]
Sent you an email : er. huineng.

Have you ever

Said "I love you" and meant it? : to jesus.

Gone out in public in your pajamas : nahs. :) my p's are for my beed :)
Kept a secret from everyone : yea like duh. who doesnt

Cried during a movie : i teared. hah. for like seconds. matrix.
Ever at anytime owned new kids on the block stuff : my dad. huge fan. errr.

Planned your week based on the TV Guide : man my life's planned out by that. i am soooo a potato couch. and happy. :)

Been on stage : yea. and hated every single moment of it.

Been to New York : wld love 2 someday. wanna see the ''gauche-est'' city in the world. and juz how cool and diff. the pple are. good for the soul. :)

Been to California : nopes

Hawaii : ooooh. sadly nopes.

China : er. haha. nopes.

Canada: get a hint! NO.

Europe: no.

Asia : for obv reasns. i won't answer this.
South America : nope

Wished you were the opposite sex :erm. don thnk so.

What time is it now? donno. late. 1am?

Apples or bananas? : bananas!

Blue or red? : erm. i like both. depends on what shade. sparklin blue. and bloodshot red.

Walmart or target? : erm. no clue

Spring or Fall? : fall. my fav season. :)

What are you gonna do after you finish this? : donno. use the phone moz prob. cant get 2 sleep.
hat was the last meal you ate? : eh. dinner.

High school or college? : college.

Are you bored? : well like duh.

Last noise you heard? : typin on the keyboards. freaky. oh and my dad screamin at me. sigh.

Last smell you sniffed? : estee lauder's paradise. mmmm.

Last time you went out of state/province? : last yr. sigh.

FRIENDSHIP/LOVE

Do you believe in love at first sight? : er. not really. but oh well.

Do you want children one day & if so, how many? : i don want children of my own. i don wanna see how they turn out. don wanna pass on bad genes or sump'n. i wanna adopt. :) loads'a kids. maybe 3. haha. frm cambodia. vietnam. and somewhere else. maybe sg. don thnk i'll mind disabilities.

Most important thing to you in a friendship is : acceptance.reliance. honesty.

Other Info

Criminal record? : nada.

Do you speak any other languages? : hah no. my malay sucks. im learnin latin tho! online. wich is like. BAD. but loove it! :)

Last book you read : the weddin - nic. sparks. gr8 book.

Name some of your favorite things in your bedroom? : my doggy! :) my boombox. its my life source. and eerm. the coold floor. mmm. :)

Thing you dislike about yourself the most : attitude.

Worst feeling in the world : outcasted.

Who you love : God. mankind. walt whitman for such gr8 insight!

Who you miss : pri sch frens. and a1sg peeps. haha.

You

Nickname(s): shar. sk[?!] and. b**ch[affeectionate term btw]

Initials: s.k sharan kaur. yea
How old do you look?: shanqi says i look 17. adora says i look 16. i thnk i look 10 or 70. so yea.

How old do you act?: sometimes 10. most of the time 70. thnk 2 much.

Glasses/Contacts: both. but hate contacts. troublesome.
Braces?: sigh. they're beautiful. most at least.
esp blue. wow. hunka]licious. :)
Do you have any pets?: used 2. prefer stuffed toys. :) loove em!

You get embarrassed: 2 much.

What makes you happy?: feelin @ ease and away frm my worries. wow.

What upsets you?: lots. basically bein misunderstood. but ive gotten used 2 that so. whatver.

Finish the sentence:

I Love doin stuffs like this to fill my time and get me sleepy.

I Miss innocence

I Wish no more outcasts. juz pure love and acceptance. for everyone. i wanna start. hmmmmm.

I Hope i don live to see someone i love die. that's like the worst thng that could ever happen.

I'm Annoyed at myself. donno why.

I Am confused. and TIRED. but cant sleep.

I Want bliss. on earth. sigh.

I Would Never try 2 purposely dissapoint pple again...

I'd Rather forget myself. and donate my soul to others.
I Am Tired but i cant sleep. of school. of work. of unmet expectations. unrealistic hopes and dreams. of my mind.

I Will Always be.

Have you ever
Thought you were going to die: yep.. haha. by a car-crash summre. sigh. im not ready at all. not ready.

Wanted to Run away: yea. to amelia's house. haha.

Flunked a grade: nah. thank heavens

Skipped a grade: nah. not that smart.

ooh. its over. that was fast. hmmm.

2003-11-16T16:15:00.007+08:00
yaaayy. not goin sch tmr. sigh. feelin really bad all of a sudden. maybe cos i promised mrs loh. more like vowed.
aaah whatever.

really hyper now! yippie.
okay im really bored.

watched are u hot juz not. gosh there was like this super hunk. and the freakin judges thgt he was not hot. like ???!!!!
thre was this guy...shipley. haha. what a name. hot. :)
oooh and of course lorenzo! hot. but alll he can do is ogle at all the ''adorable gals with the ass-ets.'' gosh how himbotic can a guy get? hah oh wells.

erm yea. realised all my entries are bout crap....hmmm
oh! went country manna wit adora today. damn funny. she like, relished the sooup. haha. really relished it. every single drop. funny 2 watch her eat. weird.

yehs. lalala. to pon or not to pon. aaaargh.
im gonna continue wit this post. juz coz im really bored.

really scared for my o's. and headstart and all the mid stuffs. my mom said don care bout my sciences...work on my maths-s[is thre such a word? hmm]. aah!thats suicide! but..i donno. sometimes i really wish i was born smart.
sigh sigh.
okay fine. and a little bit. no a LOT less procastinating. sigh.
wonder why suddenly slack so much. last yr was pretty alrites. hmmm.

wonder if there's anythin on tv right now. hmmms.

okays I AM BORED.

cheap thrill.

2003-11-16T16:15:00.006+08:00
God help the outcasts - bette midler
I don't know if You can hear me
Or if You're even there
I don't know if You would listen
To a gypsy's prayer
Yes, I know I'm just an outcast
I shouldn't speak to you
Still I see Your face and wonder
Were You once an outcast too?

God help the outcasts
Hungry from birth
Show them the mercy
They don't find on earth
The lost and forgotten
They look to you still
God help the outcasts
Or nobody will

I ask for nothing
I can get by
But I know so many
Less lucky than I
God help the outcasts
The poor and downtrod
I thought we all were
The children of God

I don't know if there's a reason
Why some are blessed, some not
Why the few You seem to favor
They fear usFlee us
Try not to see us

God help the outcasts
The tattered, the torn
Seeking an answer
To why they were born
Winds of misfortune
Have blown them about
You made the outcasts
Don't cast them out
The poor and unlucky
The weak and the odd
I thought they all were
The children of God

2003-11-16T16:15:00.005+08:00
top of the world - the carpenters
Such a feelin's comin' over me
There is wonder in most everything I see
Not a cloud in the sky
Got the sun in my eyes
And I won't be surprised if it's a dream

Everything I want the world to be
Is now coming true especially for me
And the reason is clear
It's because you are here
You're the nearest thing to heaven that I've seen

I'm on the top of the world lookin' down on creation
And the only explanation I can find
Is the love that I've found ever since you've been around
Your love's put me at the top of the world

Something in the wind has learned my name
And it's tellin' me that things are not the same
In the leaves on the trees and the touch of the breeze
There's a pleasin' sense of happiness for me

There is only one wish on my mind
When this day is through I hope that I will find
That tomorrow will be just the same for you and me
All I need will be mine if you are here

I'm on the top of the world lookin' down on creation
And the only explanation I can find
Is the love that I've found ever since you've been around
Your love's put me at the top of the world

~ aaah, love this song. :) so happy. makes me feel again. ahha.

2003-11-16T16:15:00.004+08:00
And I call to mankind, Be not curious about God,
For I, who am curious about each, am not curious
about God,
No array of terms can say how much I am at
peace about God, and about death.

I hear and behold God in every object, yet I
understand God not in the least,
Nor do I understand who there can be more won-
derful than myself.

Why should I wish to see God better than this
day ?
I see something of God each hour of the twenty-
four, and each moment then,
In the faces of men and women I see God, and
in my own face in the glass,
I find letters from God dropped in the street, and
every one is signed by God's name,
And I leave them where they are, for I know
that others will punctually come forever and
ever.

And as to you death, and you bitter hug of mor-
tality, it is idle to try to alarm me.

[[[aint it nice! i loooove this guy. leaves of grass 1856 - walt whitman]]]

`feeling: nochalant
`listening: shakespeare in love
`thinkin: time passes dammmn slow
`perception: bullet wounds are 'e best way to die.....being shot over and over in yr bod and arms[juz not legs]. hmm. the evils of music. :-d not.
`waitin: for are you hot to start. and my mom 2 get home. and for sch tmr.cos im deaad bored here. sigh.

2003-11-16T16:15:00.003+08:00

Nemesis

?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

1234

bird flu=me

i hate everything about you

Normally, people can stand a certain amount of very bad & even excruciating pain. whether from a physical injury, or an internal disease like cancer . from a life circumstance - loss of a job or home . or from losing a loved one through death or divorce.

Normally, people can stand a certain amount of very bad & even excruciating pain.

Normally, people can stand a certain amount of very bad & even excruciating pain.

whether from a physical injury, or an internal disease like cancer . from a life circumstance - loss of a job or home . or from losing a loved one through death or divorce.

But after a while, pain wears on us. Often, normal people in constant pain for an extended length of time will begin to think of suicide even though they never thought of it before.

But after a while, pain wears on us.

But after a while, pain wears on us.

Often, normal people in constant pain for an extended length of time will begin to think of suicide even though they never thought of it before.

Normally, people can stand a certain
amount of very bad & even excruciating pain.

whether from a physical injury, or an internal
disease like cancer

.

from a life circumstance - loss of a job
or home

.

or from losing a loved one through death
or divorce.

Normally, people can stand a certain
amount of very bad & even excruciating pain.

Normally, people can stand a certain
amount of very bad & even excruciating pain.

whether from a physical injury, or an internal
disease like cancer

.

from a life circumstance - loss of a job
or home

.

or from losing a loved one through death
or divorce.

But after a while, pain wears on us.

Often, normal people in constant pain for
an extended length of time will
begin to think of suicide even though
they never thought of it before.

Often, normal people in constant pain for
an extended length of time will
begin to think of suicide even though
they never thought of it before.